She Came from Lightyears Away
by SomeKindOfWizard
Summary: Aboard the Star Ship Konoha, a low-rank Captain Naruto comes across an alien, she calls herself a "Kyuubi". The Kyuubi is stowed away on ship. But when weird changes overcome Naruto, and the ship is in danger, what will happen to them? Naru/Female Kyuubi.
1. Intro

_**Author Note****  
**_

_**Hey there! It's SKoW. Don't worry I'm still writing Eyes. But I had a brain-explosion and decided I could get out of my writing funk by doing a quick one-shot. I'm putting up the prologue now and I'll have it done by next week! Yeah, Sci-fi. Who'da thunk? But I took a theory and rolled with it, and did a writing frame. And, well...I liked it. It's just going to be a one-shot, even if by some extreme fluke it's popular. I'll try and keep the chars as they should be, except way more bitter with Naruto. I'm gonna make the language rough, and the actions brutal. Trust me, it'll be M rating. Heck, I'll even sneak a lemon in to the end.**_

_**So, when it comes out, enjoy. Otherwise keep those peepers peeled. Thanks**_

_**-Some Kind of Wizard**_

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"Get your arse here right-fucking-now Naruto. How do you explain three fights in a week?"

"They had it coming to them..."

"Tch, fuck it...Naruto, I know it's rough, but the crew need to see you need to be reprimanded in some way. We're approaching a salvage. You're to collect any reasonable supplies. A little grunt work will set you straight".

Naruto grunted, nodding and walking out.

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"What in the hell?" Naruto was lost for any further words, she was as beautiful as she was absurd. Her long, scarlet hair shone in the light of distant stars. She was so amazing it made his insides hurt. She turned to face him, opening her eyes, with a colour as deep as her hair. As they began to focus, she leant in closer. It was then he noticed she was naked, and only after that did he see nine elegant fox tails flow out from behind her as she leant on the rim of the capsule.

"So...what's your name?"


	2. Part One

**Author's Notes**

**_Hey there lovelies and loveliettes! This is part one of the one-shot. Originally I intended for it to be only one submission, but as I went on it bulked out a lot better than I had expected, and I was able to fit in more. If I'm honest it's long enough to be two chapters long, but I didn't want to push my luck. So this week you get part one. Next week will be part two, which will be the last part regardless of wether it's ridiculously long. Well, that's unless there's some cap on how many words per chapter can be uploaded. I'm not so sure thinking about it. *shrugs* Regardless, I'm really taken with this story right now. I think it's far and again superior to Eyes. There's a lot more description than there usually is, and I'm going to keep from putting in more than the perspectives of Naruto and Tsumeki._**

**_I hope you like this story as much as I'm enjoying writing it! A special thanks to Mikie-From-Ireland, a fellow Naru/Femkyuu writer. He helped me to describe the ship. Because my first idea was...well, shit. I can't write space ships xD. His stuff is just fucking awesome by the way. Check out Illegal Lovers: Naruto and Kyuubi (_**.net/s/4270101/1/Illegal_Lovers_Naruto_and_Kyuubi) and **_S-Class Lovers _**(.net/s/4603321/1/S_Class_Lovers) _**They're both incredible. Infact, read all of his stuff. If you haven't already then why the hell are you reading my crap?**_

_**Apologies for any typos, if you see them or some sentences that don't make any sense send me a PM and I'll fix them up :)**_

_**Much love from your lord and master - Some Kind of Wizard. x**_

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**_

One Shot – Part One

There was a subtle suction noise throughout the deck as the ship steadily decreased in speed. Naruto watched out of the only window in his room as the blur of stars at light speed became still. He yawned and dragged himself up from bed, grumbling as he walked over to his bathroom, to look in the mirror. Crystal blue eyes looked back at him, the bags beneath them a testament to his lack of sleep. His hair was scruffy and blonde, and birthmarks across his cheeks almost resembled whiskers. They said his mother had similar marks on her shoulders.

He wandered over to the small drawer of his tiny metal cube of a room and pulled out a pair of black trousers,a black long-sleeved shirt, and a grey stab-vest. He reached out and grabbed his ID badge from on top of the drawer, reading it aloud as he had every morning. "Captain Naruto Uzumaki, 18, Male, Armaments and Combat specialist" It had taken him three years longer than necessary to reach the rank, he wasn't about to take it for granted.

He was about to open his door when it slid open before him, revealing a rather irritated Lieutenant, he wore the same black clothing, albeit with a green stab-vest and a mask he never seemed to take off. No doubt his ID badge had his actual face on it, but nobody had seen him use it before. "Oi Naruto, the commander wanted to see you about thirty minutes ago".

Naruto growled, bringing hand to face "Kakashi, why didn't you tell me that _forty_ minutes ago then?"

For a moment his Lieutenant and once-teacher fumbled. "Well, I would've, but I was late, a child crossed my path and he looked a little lost".

Naruto grumbled and walked past him "Lame". He travelled down the simple staff corridor, after traversing the maze of halls and rooms he reached the main deck. From there it was a simple wander to reach the control room, where his now-drunk Commander was sat reclining in her seat. As usual the Second-in-Command Shizune was doing most of the work. He could hear the drunken rambling before he was fully in the room.

"Ah the pride! The pride Shizune to be at the helm of the largest Starship in active service". And it was true; it carried three hundred passengers, only forty of whom being staff such as Naruto.

Shizune simply rolled her eyes as Naruto walked in, door sliding closed behind him. "Yes Tsunade, the Konoha is a mighty vessel. Naruto is here to see you-late as usual".

Naruto growled as he came to stand a distance from Tsunade's chair "Kakashi took too long reaching me. Now what is it you wanted to see me about?"

"Get your arse here right-fucking now Naruto" She waited for him to step in closer before she sat upright. "How do you explain three fights in one week?"

Naruto glowered, in the canteen he'd gotten in to a punch-up with Kiba, Lee, and to his surprise a drunk Sakura. He was still trying to recover from a cracked rib after that one. "They had it coming to them".

Tsunade sighed, leaning back in her drunken haze, she half-spoke to him and half-thought aloud. "Tch, fuck it...Naruto, I know it's rough, but the crew need to see you need to be reprimanded in some way. We're approaching a salvage. You're to collect any reasonable supplies. A little grunt work will set you straight". She waited for Naruto's usual outburst of swearing and refusal. She was surprised when he simply grunted.

"Yeah sure, I'll head down to the storage bay" Naruto mumbled, meandering out. He was too tired to argue today. He walked through the main deck, and stepped in to the elevator. Three men were already there, two were lab-workers, the third was a civilian. They all peered at him with a combination of contempt and fear. Naruto ignored the looks, pressing the button to the basement deck and leaning back on the wall.

Tsunade frowned in her chair "That kid's no fun to mess with anymore".

When the doors had closed and the lift had begun it's descent. One of the lab-lackeys (a bespectacled, greasy young man) turned to his colleague "Is it actually true?" The other answered with a simple nod. They must have assumed Naruto wouldn't guess what he was talking about. Which was a bad mistake with his current mood.

Naruto reached out and took the man's glasses off the front of his face. He dropped them on the floor; to the glasses credit they didn't shatter, not even a chip. His foot hovered on top of them for a moment until he picked up the horror on the man's face, not to mention those of his companion's face and the other random man. He sighed and reached down, picking the glasses up and putting them on the man's face. "Don't go there again fucker, or I'll break your glasses _and_ your nose".

All three got off the next stop, and he doubted they had all wanted to get off at that floor. He smirked as he stretched himself out in mental preperation; he hated the space suits, it was like wearing a marshmallow, a mask, and then covering it in plastic.

And as he left the elevator he was greeted by that very suit, and Shikamaru, their head-geek and tactician. Shikamaru snorted, handing him the suit "Tsunade just buzzed us and had me get you ready a suit. Throw it on and I'll get you hooked up with a tank, and some tows".

Naruto grumbled, muttered, and cursed as he squeezed in to the suit, the insulating foam within would keep him from dying in the cold of space, without it being so bulky and impossible to move in as the archaic spacesuits of the first space ventures. He fitted the mask in to place, placing the tubes in to his nostrils. As Shikamaru approached with an air-tank and helmet, Naruto slipped on the mask's hood, clipped the helmet on, and put the air-tank on like one would a backpack. Shikamaru plugged the tube in to the back of his helmet and checked the seals were all tight.

Shikamaru put on a wireless headset, speaking in to it. His voice soon buzzed in Naruto's ear from somewhere in the helmet. "_Am I coming through loud and clear?_".

Naruto gave him a thumbs up. He took a few testing breaths. "_I take it you can hear me too?_" Shikamaru nodded, and then left the cargo bay. Naruto walked through the airlock, in to a larger room. He picked up several tow-hooks, clipping one on to his belt. "_I'm ready, open her up_" Naruto grunted in to the helmet, gripping the tow-hooks tighter; he hated this part. The giant door slid open, the only piece of metal separating Naruto from the empty blackness of space. A blackness which was suddenly getting a lot closer as the oxygen rushed out to join that nothingness. "_Fuck, fuck, fuck fuck fuck_" Naruto repeated like a mantra until he was floating in nothingness, tethered to the Konoha by a single line.

Soon his swearing stopped though as the sight stole his breath away. "_Fuuuck..._" Okay, almost stopped. The Konoha was a magnificent sight as always. The great metal beast featured green strips along it's missile-like length against it's silver skin. The engines were large, nay-gargantuan in size, and had the power to push the ship through light speed and beyond. Circles around three boxes lay near the shaft of the ship, each of which was an opening that disguised lethal turrets capable of shooting six-hundred and nineteen rounds in a single millisecond. He was somewhere below the Konoha right now, looking at the wreckage of a more archaic ship, he was on wreckage duty.

The combinations of twisted metal floated and spun in the new disturbance the ship had created, unable to cease moving without gravity. "_What the fuck is there out here you want me to salvage? There's just scrap metal out here!_" Naruto growled in irritation. He flexed his toes in a motion that pressed against a switch in his suit. Two entirely minute blasts of air from his air-tank/backpack propelled him further in to the wreckage. He ducked below one particularly large chunk of metal. At his estimate it was a courier ship. Only a handful of crew chairs were visible, but there was more than enough metal to store something much larger.

Finally Shikamaru's voice came through his helmet again. "_There should be some crates, maybe a couple of boxes. No idea why but that ship was scuttled. We figure we mind as well pick up whatever's inside while the engines cool for the next jump_".

Naruto grunted back, and resumed his searching. He ducked once more under half of a chair, then a screen bashed in to his leg and threw his balance out. Perhaps it was the new perspective but whilst he slowly twisted upside down he noticed a few much more solid pieces of wreckage; two large metal supply crates. Easily twice as tall as he and twice that again in width. "_I can confirm two of 'em. Big, big fuckin' crates. There should be enough space for 'em, but it'll take a while_".

Another long pause. "_'K, hook them up, reel them in, and tie them down. I'll re-flood the oxygen, and restore the gravity. You know the drill right?_"

Naruto groaned; 'The Drill' meant he was stuck in there for an hour, and he would have to check the contents. If it was radioactive, or a stockpile of lethal explosives, or a chemical weapon...well, he was fucked, but the ship would be fine. "_Yeah...I know the drill_". He could almost hear Shikamaru thinking that it was '"Better him than me".

He boosted himself in close enough to set up hooks on both of the crates. He turned around to return to the airlock and reel them in, only to have the wind knocked from his lungs as a thirteen foot square chunk of spaceship-wall slammed in to him with teeth-jarring impact. "_Gyuck!_" Naruto coughed up as his already-cracked ribs were further damaged.

There was yet another long pause before the contemplative and bored voice of Shikamaru buzzed in his ear "_You get hit by something there Naruto?_"

He merely grunted a pained affirmative in return, jetting (with a lot more care) back to the bay. He pressed down on a switch, a mechanism beneath the floor began to tow in the hooks, which were now attached to the crates. A mechanical whir drew them within the bay. A few minutes of fumbling with straps to attach them to the floor, and he was ready. "_I'm ready Shikamaru, let's get this over with so I can get myself some fucking sleep_".

"_It's being done now. I'll inform Tsunade of your status. Take stock of the contents and see if any documentation was stored_". As Shikamaru finished speaking the giant metal door began to slide closed.

A red light flashed briefly; the loud metallic rumble and the sudden feeling of his weight returning announced the restored gravity. The red light continued for a few more moments, finishing once the oxygen was fully returned. Naruto took off his helmet and removed his mask, taking a breath of fresh air. He walked over to the first crate, inspecting it; some form of explosion had long since damaged the handle and lock. He wandered over to a toolbox, pulling out a plasma-cutter. It was a simple tool that fired a hot green blade of plasma a short distance out. He held it almost touching the door of the crate, pulling hard on the trigger. A buzzing charge-up followed, and then the crumple of metal being torn asunder. "Hah, not so fucking tough". Naruto grinned, then gingerly he opened the door.

The whole crate was full of weapons, armour, and a curious plastic sheet. "Well. I'm not dead yet so no poison at least". He breezed over them quickly; most of the weapons were out of date except for a few he had never seen. But he'd check them out later. He spared the sheet a few moments of attention; it appeared to be made of some strange fibre. On closer inspection the almost see-through sheet was filled with wires, along with a switch. He shrugged once he was at least vaguely sure nothing was going to explode and kill him.

After sparing the crate a final glance Naruto walked over to the second. The door on this one appeared to be completely welded shut. He groaned upon seeing this; welded shut means something inside shouldn't be gotten out without considerable effort. "Well then, let's see what you are; bomb, radioactive material, or deadly chemical gas".

A few moments of plasma-cutting later and the door could be torn open. All that was inside was what appeared to be a metal coffin with a glass lid; but for the wires hooking it up to various machines. Naruto felt a chill as he approached the strange box, leaning over the top to peer inside. "Holy shit..."

Naruto was looking down at the face of a woman. He quickly searched the cover for some kind of latch. Although the machinery appeared to be working, he had no doubt the pale face was indeed that of a corpse. Fumbling along the edge he flicked some form of latch, and the door flung open with a hiss of ancient air. Naruto was knocked back, stumbling and falling to his feet. The motion jarred his now badly hurt ribs, and he was afraid he would black out for a moment.

Then, to his surprise, the figure began to move. A slender female hand, with elegant nails grasped the lip of the mechanical coffin.

"What in the hell?" Naruto was lost for any further words, she was as beautiful as she was absurd. Her long, scarlet hair shone in the light of distant stars. She was so amazing it made his insides hurt. She turned to face him, opening her eyes, with a colour as deep as her hair. As they began to focus, she leant in closer. It was then he noticed she was naked, and only after that did he see nine elegant fox tails flow out from behind her as she leant on the rim of the capsule.

"So...what's your name?"

The voice jarred Naruto back to reality, and he stared intently at the floor. "Who the hell are you and what are you doing there?" He made his voice sound as commanding as possible, but he was answered only by a musical laugh.

"Oi, I'm not playing around kiddo. I asked for your name; I'll gladly answer your questions if you'll be polite enough to answer mine". The woman said, folding her arms slowly and leaning her elbows on the capsule rim.

The motion covered over her breasts and allowed Naruto's brain to turn back on again. "Kiddo? Hah! You obviously don't know what's going on here. This is the star ship Konoha, and the crate you're in was found amongst the long-forgotten wreckage of a courier ship. This is the fourteenth year of the ninth star-calendar".

For a while the naked fox-woman didn't answer, as though her brain were struggling to process this. "I was put in stasis during the first year of the eighth calender..." She suddenly slumped down, scarlet eyes clouding over. "It's been one hundred and thirteen years..." She groaned and hid her face.

A lump caught in Naruto's throat, it hurt to see this strange, beautiful woman look sad. He muttered a curse word and scratched the back of his head. "Naruto, the name's Naruto. And yours?"

For a while there was no answer, until she looked back up at him, capturing his eyes again and making him feel weak. "Tsumeki. I'm well...as you can see not a human. I'm a Kyuubi". Her tails fluttered slowly, wrapping around her waist.

"So..." Naruto began, clearing his throat to continue. "You're an alien?" Naruto waited again, and Tsumeki nodded. "Well...I have some rather shit news for you. The rules aboard the Konoha state that in the rare event that an alien is encountered they are to be...uh...dissected and studied".

Tsumeki's very fox-like ears perked up and she tried to hop off of the capsule. When she landed however the strength left her legs and she stumbled, collapsing in to Naruto's arms. To her even greater surprise Naruto buckled under her meagre weight. "Ai! Hey!" she squealed as the floor began to fall away.

Naruto collapsed, growling in agony. "Ribs! Off!" he hissed through his teeth, before gasping for air as she rolled off of him.

Tsumeki frowned with worry, trying to find a way to unbuckle his suit. She yelped again when he pushed her away.

"What the-" He coughed, spitting up a small mouthful of blood on the floor. "-The..hell are you trying to do to me?" He shrugged it off and hauled himself up, looking away when she tried to stand up, tails flowing behind her. He walked away in to the second crate.

Tsumeki stumbled after him. "Wait! Don't leave, please Naruto!" she watched as he disappeared in to the crate, a moment later his arm appeared around the corner, throwing a membranous cape at her. She tugged the cape off of her face, about to reprimand him before she realised what it was. "Eh, how did you know to give me this?"

Naruto frowned, poking his head around the corner. "You're naked, I had to throw you something". He returned to the inside of the crate, taking a deep breath. A naked alien woman who goes by the name of Tsumeki just jumped out of a stasis capsule. He wondered how long it had been since the oxygen had been returned. There was probably another half-hour before anyone could enter. When that happened they'd take her away and kill her for science. He had to admit; that's pretty damn cruel.

While he was thinking he noticed everything was a lot dimmer, and more sideways than usual. "Whu-urgh". He collapsed, gasping for air. He'd done more to his ribs than he'd thought. Bastards shouldn't of sent him out. A sharp slap brought him back to reality. "Ouch! That hurt damnit bitch..."

Tsumeki growled, considering slapping him again, but she shrugged it off. "Naruto. Will you help me?"

Naruto blinked, his eyes focused on her own as his brain tried to comprehend. "To save an alien has the potential of putting the entire ship at risk. Just to save one person?" He grinned, looking maniacal for a few small moments. "Fuck yes, what can I do?" Then he coughed, pain racking his body; had the rib scratched a lung? He wasn't dead yet so it probably hadn't punctured. Tsumeki was trying to speak to him but her words sounded like dull feedback at the centre of his mind.

96th year, eighth calendar

A four year old boy with spiky yellow hair was being carried, he was incredibly scared, and a light was flashing red, accompanied by a siren. "D-dad! What's going on!" he bawled, tugging at the arm that held him so tight it was hurting to breathe, as though if he was let go of he would never be picked up again.

He was loosened at last from his fathers grasp, only to be handed in to a more slender pair of arms, but they held him just as tightly. His hair was damp now with tears. "We're sorry Naru-kun. We're so, so sorry". The floor shook and they almost fell down.

Naruto screamed, beginning to cry before a mask was put on his face. His father faced him now. "This is the most important thing right now. Count to seven and remember how much we love you".

Naruto did so, and the world swam before him. He stopped counting at six to yell for help when a cover fell closed and a set of buckles tightened. He knew deep down that this was the last time he would ever see them, he was terrified.

And alone.

Present day; 14th year, ninth calendar, march 13th, 12:00pm

Naruto groaned against the always artificial light. It had been a few months since he had last thought about his parents. The ship was in the middle of a power struggle. Of the two hundred members on it, he and his parents had been three of them. Somewhere along the lines of fifty people rebelled against the commander, and his father as the lieutenant was needed then and there. Except when the battle turned ugly, he turned tail and ran, sacrificing themselves, and by proxy all those that needed them for the sake of evacuating Naruto in the commander's pod.

It turned even uglier when his father wasn't there to try and disarm the bomb that annihilated them all. One hundred and ninety-nine deaths in the blink of an eye. For some reason people felt that he was to blame. But what could they know about how much somebody cared for them? He couldn't imagine anybody caring that much for him now. A childhood of being stared at as though he were a monster, without the comfort of a family had done much to make him rather emotionally damaged. Not to mention him spending most of his childhood years causing trouble.

His brow furrowed and he turned his thoughts back to the here-and-now. Namely of the alien hidden somewhere on this ship. Right now he was lying in a hospital bed. And judging by the lack of uproar and gossip in the medical bay halls she hadn't been found. With a groan he tugged away the sheets and got out of the medical bed. The room was a line of curtain-ringed beds, beeping machines, and the odd sleep-deprived looking doctor.

Naruto shrugged off the painful tug of his muscles and got up completely. He was just as surprised as the nurse who had been walking towards him to find he was naked. There was a screech "Shit".

After a half-hour of apologising and paperwork, a now fully-dressed Naruto was heading towards the bay to find Shikamaru. He couldn't shake the feeling that he was being stared at. Upon spotting the geek and tactician in the hall, Naruto flagged him down. "Oi, Shikamaru".

Shikamaru faced Naruto with a bored look on his face "Amazing find in those crates Naruto. One of those archaic stasis capsules, and a selection of weird weapons. We've been dismantling and playing with them for the past day you've been out".

Naruto's eyes widened "A day?!" Where on earth had Tsumeki gone then?

Shikamaru smirked, nodding "Yup, anyway, we told the Commander you were fine, turfed you down to the medics. I assume because you're walking around now you've no lasting damage?" He didn't wait for even a nod from Naruto before he continued. "Now listen, did you see -anything- in that capsule? Because we're sure that it should have been occupied, there were charts and everything. Also one of the items were missing from the other crate. We've no idea what but the stock charter stored in the weapons crate didn't match what we could find".

Naruto frowned, shaking his head. "Nope, I busted open the door and saw the capsule, and cracked open the weapons one and took a brief look around. Then I tripped, hit my ribs on the floor and blacked out". The lie was off-the-cuff, but damn if it wasn't smooth.

Shikamaru grunted in disappointment "Fair enough, you should get back to your room before the next jump".

Naruto half saluted, turning on his heel to return to the elevator. Perhaps Tsumeki had already gone there. He swiped his ID card and walked in as the door slid open. He felt a blob barge him off balance and he whirled around to face nothing. "What the hell?"

Tsumeki appeared out of thin air once the door had slid closed. She was stood at the front of his bed, wearing the mesh cape. Of course, it didn't leave much to the imagination and Naruto looked away. "It's about time you headed back! I was forced to hide under that stupid bed for an entire day waiting for you to come-to!" She growled and took a step forward, taking delight in how Naruto took an instinctive step back. "It was cold, and I'm naked, and I-" She stopped midway in her speech and started to go red in the face.

Naruto assumed it was her nudity. "I'm only looking at your face". He flinched when she was only a few steps away from him, hopping from foot to foot. She leant in closely so that her hair tickled his neck and mumbled.

"Where's your toilet? I-I really need to go". She stepped back again, looking about.

"You're shitting me right?" Naruto waited for an answer, but when all he got was an embarrassed glare he pointed to his left at another sliding door. "In there, there's a bath too if you need it, but I'd not use it yet". Once again he was barged past by the caped-blob, the door slid open and she disappeared. "I'm putting the whole ship at risk for this one person? Geez..."

Tsumeki sat on the toilet, grumbling to herself, and looking around. She; one who was queen among her race was dependant on some human to provide her with solace. The bath looked sorely tempting, and she couldn't see any reason why not to use it. When the rest of her...business was concluded, she twisted the tap, wriggling with delight at the prospect of a hot, bubbly bath. As it filled she noticed two speakers attached to the wall above the bath, with a small touch-screen display. "Hmm..."

Naruto groaned when he heard the pouring of water; she hadn't listened to his advice on waiting. He had to try as hard as he could to keep himself under control; he'd never been touched by another woman, to say the least the beautiful, naked alien with foxes tails, ears, and the most perfectly round breasts was an over stimulation. He dug around in his drawers, digging in to his civilian wear. He tugged out an oversized scarlet hoodie with indiscriminate tribal markings on it, a pair of boxers, and some baggy jeans. And of course a belt. There was no way it would fit, but her breasts would probably render a shirt useless.

He cringed when the lighting in his room turned blue for a few seconds, lying himself down in bed. "I'm sure this will be my fault".

Tsumeki hummed a happy tune, eyes sticking out just above the hot, bubbly water. It had been much, much too long since she'd had a lavish soaking, and even this small bath was like heaven. She reached out of the water with a stretch, tapping on the touch screen. The words read 'Five Fingered Death Punch'. "What kind of stupid name is that?" Intrigued, she pressed play. 'Now Playing – Far From Home (2009)' Pre-space human calendar years? That shit _was_ old.

_Another day in this carnival of souls  
Another nights sands end as quickly as it goes  
The memories are shadows ink on the page  
And I can't seem to find my way home_

The song was rather apt, thinking about it her memories of home were hazy at best. She just knew she had been important.

_And it's almost like  
Your heaven's trying everything  
Your heaven's trying everything  
To keep me out_

Naruto buried his head under his pillow. The blue light flashed again, and now she was playing his music. At least she'd chosen that song and not The Way of the Fist. He chuckled, imagining her classic reaction. He began to sing along to the next verse.

_All the places I've been and things I've seen  
A million stories that made up a million shattered dreams  
The faces of people I'll never see again  
And I can't seem to find my way home_

Tsumeki grinned, hearing his singing; it was actually pretty good. The blue light was bothering her, but she didn't want to call for Naruto in the bath; dignity must be reclaimed after all the times he'd seen her complete nudity. After a moment's pondering she half leant over the bath, shivering at the cold rim of the bath against her warm skin. "Naruto?"

_Cause it's almost like  
Your heaven's trying everything to break me down  
Cause it's almost like  
Your heaven's trying everything to keep me out _

As the next verse came to an end the lights turned blue for the third time; from experience he knew the third was the last. He tensed himself up as the room gently shook. Then everything jerked forwards, threatening to send the pile of clothes Naruto had chosen for her in to the wall. He heard a screech and a slam, and jumped to his feet. "Shit! She wasn't in the bath?" He slammed his hand on the sliding door and it opened instantly despite being occupied; a security precaution.

"Don't come in!"

Naruto yelped and turned right around again, walking out the door and going red in the face. "That was...so...uh...just...wow...".

Tsumeki lay sprawled on the floor, arse in the air and pointed towards the door Naruto had just entered in. Her tails, although soaked, were waving around her; she looked like some stunning pornography model. She hauled herself up and sunk back in to the bath.

"That fucker!"

Luckily another hour in the bath had calmed her down, and she opened the door to find Naruto asleep, sprawled out shirtless on the bed. At her feet were a set of clothes, she frowned at their size, but put them on regardless. As she changed she inspected her saviour; she had to admit he was rather good looking for a puny, irritating human. However; she had other needs, and she eagerly nudged Naruto awake.

"Nya-uh..." Naruto turned to face her, brain speeding up. "Ah! Tsumeki, uh, sorry for seeing y-" he was cut off by a wave from Tsumeki.

"Don't spoil my mood by bringing it up. I already know how you can make it up to me". She grinned at Naruto maniacally. She had planned to revel in how nervous he was getting, but her body betrayed her with a monstrous growl from her stomach.

Naruto snorted with laughter, then pointed at the door next to the bathroom one. "Kitchen's in there. There's plenty of food in the fridge, I just recently got more. Pans are in the left cupboard, don't use the oven, stove's fine". He rolled on to his side, closing his eyes again.

Tsumeki frowned. "What, that's it?" She put her hands on her hips.

Naruto didn't bother moving "Tch, I'm not doing it. I've already put myself way out of line to help you, I'm sure you can feed yourself". He took a deep breath, exhaling slowly. Did she expect him to do everything?

"Bah, fine then. I'm not making any for you!" Tsumeki growled, storming through the door in to the kitchen. When it slid closed behind her she frowned. "Wish I knew how to cook..."

Thirty minutes passed and Naruto was finally beginning to drift off; it's uncomfortable sleeping when your ribs are in a mess. Then the door slid open, and Tsumeki slowly padded out. He figured he mind as well ask since she would say something anyway. "So, what did you make?" he all but mumbled in to his pillow.

Tsumeki bit her lip, face going red. "Uh...about that...I don't think it worked". She looked over her shoulder at the pan; she hadn't thought it was possible to burn noodles.

Naruto groaned, sitting up stiffly. "What do you mean it didn't work?" He shuffled off of the bed and squeezed past her in the sliding door, covering up a blush by scratching the front of his head when his chest rubbed against hers. He inspected his kitchen, stir-fry sauce was up one wall, and the pan looked like a blackened, charred mess. "You've got to be fucking kidding me..."

An hour later and Kyuubi was sat down cross legged on the floor of Naruto's room, eating ravenously from an entire wok's worth of noodles, meat, and vegetables. She appeared to take great delight in tearing away at a particularly tough chunk of pork.

Naruto watched her, taking a mental note; she had rather sharp looking teeth. Not only that; she ate an awful lot. Hopefully this would be a one-time occurrence – he'd cooked enough for three people, which she was wolfing down. Before his own stomach grumbled and gave him away he pulled on his shirt, scooped up his id badge and began to head out of the door.

Tsumeki paused in her eating to look up, a lone bean sprout falling from her mouth in an unladylike fashion. "Where are you going?"

Naruto waved her off "I'm going to go and have a drink. Stay in here and don't do anything stupid".

Tsumeki snarled at the closing door, incredulous. "Don't do anything stupid? Who in the name of hells does he think he is?"

Naruto made his way through the winding hallways, he knew the way to the staff bar almost mechanically and he'd only been drinking for half a year. The door slid open to the smell of cigarettes and hard liquor; just the way he preferred it. He cast a cursory glance about, spotting his only friends aboard the ship. Well...they were more colleagues that didn't hate him, but that made the duo part of a very exclusive collection of people.

A red-headed man turned around to face Naruto, the kanji for Love tattooed to his forehead. He was well built, and his senior in arms and combat. Hanging off of his left arm was a sandy-haired tomboy with an unlit cigarette between her lips. She was rather short and probably only looked 16. In actual fact she was about twenty, as was the red-head. Although she looked rather flimsy, she too could've been in the armaments and combat department, but she was one of the science nerds (the pay was a lot better apparently).

Naruto waved at them both as he approached "Hey Gaara" The red-head nodded. "Karegawa" She nodded likewise, grinning at him.

Karegawa pulled the cigarette from her mouth. "You look like shit, go get yourself a drink".

Naruto grunted an unspoken retort, wandering up to the bar and ordering a beer; it was cheap, but it wasn't bad. He inspected Gaara over his shoulder; he too had a rather grim past. His mother died at childbirth, and his father very nearly killed him, agreeing to let him be tested on as a baby. He spent a lot of his childhood years being picked on for being strange, mentally unstable, and generally un-likeable. The moment he and Karegawa became partners changed that though.

He sat back down with them, swigging from his bottle. "So, how are you two?"

Gaara pondered for a moment. "Just fine Naruto, but what's up with you? You seem...different".

Karegawa nodded an agreement. "Something bugging you?"

Naruto shook his head; they may be his friends but he couldn't tell them. "Nah, guess I'm just a little tired". He took another swig, and began immersing in the general small talk. It continued like this for a while until Naruto began to feel rather wobbly.

Karegawa sighed, helping Naruto from his chair. "Come'n y'lug. I figured you'd tell us what was bothering you if we let you keep drinking, but this is just ridiculous".

Naruto smirked, as he stood he made his way out, or he tried to.

"Oh, how surprising! Going back to your room shitfaced again huh Naruto?" the piercing, degrading voice of the black haired emo-teen rattled Naruto right down to his teeth; Sasuke.

He whirled around to face Sasuke, shaking off his drunken stupor momentarily. "What now? I'm not going to bed with you even if I _am_ drunk. So fuck off". He folded his arms, grunting away his frustration. Gaara's hand landed firmly on his shoulder gripping at it.

"Naruto, don't bother getting in to another fight, I'll handle it for you". Gaara made a motion to step past him, but was blocked by Naruto's arm. He sighed and took a step back.

"Good plan, your little buddy there's a pussy anyway ever since he got hauled down by his lady". Sasuke smirked, venom dripping off of each syllable as though he were a snake.

Naruto dived forwards, swinging a fist out. However it didn't appear to connect to a jaw as he'd been hoping, and he was knocked back on his arse after a kick landed on his shoulder. He couldn't put it all down to alcohol either; Sasuke was a higher rank than him. Though Gaara still out-stripped them both.

Gaara jumped over Naruto, swinging a foot out to roundhouse kick Sasuke, but this attack too met nothing. Sasuke dropped below the kick, grabbing his foot from the air and swinging him in to the wall behind him with the momentum.

"Fucking told you" Sasuke smirked, he lifted Naruto up by the collar and punched him in the face, letting him crumple to the ground. "You're always stronger alone".

Naruto was stunned; Gaara was taken out, had he really gotten weaker after meeting Karegawa? The alcohol in his brain wouldn't let him stand up after the punch. "I'll kill you, bastard!"

Sasuke took a step forward, foot poised to connect with his ribs. "I already know you're hurt. If I kicked you hard enough now you'd get a punctured lung". He stopped and crouched down, much too close for comfort. "And I've not given up on you yet, I need a handsome bitch".

Naruto shuddered in disgust, thankful that this time his punch connected. He scrambled backwards, still unable to stand.

Sasuke would've retaliated, but for some reason he was staring at the floor, arms locked behind him with a knee in his lower back.

"That's enough" Karegawa said, grinding her knee against his back. Gaara was still dragging himself to his feet behind them both, groaning. "Naruto, go back to your room before things get any worse".

14th year, ninth calendar, march 14th, 03:00am

Tsumeki lay on Naruto's bed, staring at the ceiling. Was he going to come back? Maybe he'd changed his mind and told them she was hiding here? Finally the door slid open. Her sensitive nose was assaulted by the smell of cheap alcohol, cigarettes, and blood. "Naruto, what happened? Why were you gone so long?"

She frowned and hauled herself up. That inconsiderate arsehole making her worry and keeping her awake how dare h-- "Naruto your face!" Previously built up scorn forgotten she bounded over to him, bringing her hands up to his face; he had a bleeding nose and a black eye.

Naruto flinched the moment her hand reached his face "Get the fuck off me!" He didn't want to become any weaker, to let this woman get under his skin as Karegawa had done for Gaara. Of course, he was too drunk to realise he had more than over reacted when she was worrying. He sauntered in to the bathroom to check himself out.

Tsumeki watched the bathroom door slide closed, she looked at her hand. It trembled, and she wasn't sure with which emotion. For now she assumed it was rage, and she banged on the sliding door with her fist. "Naruto you fucker! Is that any way to--" The door opened automatically under her fist, making her jump back.

Naruto stared up at her, face now washed. He was greatly surprised - sobered in fact to see tears on her face "I...I-uh..." He sighed. "Sorry, I over reacted". He dug his hand in to his trouser pocket, pulling out a clean handkerchief, which he threw towards her face. She was still a woman after all, it was no way to talk to one. He walked up to the door, and she moved aside to let him exit. "Hungry". He hadn't eaten all day either (seeing as his portion had been devoured).

Tsumeki sniffed, aware that her nose had gotten slightly runny. She blew her nose on the handkerchief, disturbed to be pressing something that smelt so strongly of him up to her face. Had she imagined that her face was slightly damp too? Maybe the hanky had been wet at the edges.

Naruto yawned, boiling the kettle and pulling a pot of instant ramen-noodles from a cupboard. He peeled the lid away and separated his chopsticks. When the bubbling of heated water reached it's crescendo, he poured it out in to the pot, watching it fill.

Tsumeki leant on the edge of the doorway, stifling her own yawn. "Where do you keep the spare bed sheets?"

Naruto snorted a small laugh through a mouthful of noodles. He quickly swallowed them "Hah, you'll just have to put on more clothing and sleep on the rug". He took another mouthful, stopping her before she could speak up. "I may feel bad for snapping at you, but that doesn't mean that you'll get to take my bed too. I'm the one saving you after all". He wolfed down the rest of his meal, and went back in to the bedroom, Tsumeki stood aside to allow him to pass.

Naruto peered across at Tsumeki and tugged his shirt off, noting it was stained at the neck with blood from his nose. He wandered back in to the bathroom to do the usual pre-sleep preparations. As he brushed his teeth he inspected his chest; most of the flesh around his ribs had gone a not-so-great purple colour.

Tsumeki's ears twitched to the sound of flushing, she made a disgusted face and curled up on the floor, an extra jumper thrown on, and a shirt wrapped around her legs. She had to remove the baggy jeans, they were cramping her tails. Each of which flowed behind her as she waited for him to exit.

Naruto threw off the rest of his clothes quickly, ignoring the fact that she stared at him the entire time. He snuck under the covers and closed his eyes "Bedroom lights off". He sighed, struggling to get comfortable. Finally he found a position, taking in a deep breath through his nose, only to be assaulted by the combined scent of pheromones and fox fur.

Tsumeki grumbled to herself, unable to get comfy on the floor. To her discomfort she could smell arousal coming from the bed, and her other needs began to work their slow way to the forefront of her mind for the first time since awakening. It had been a very, very long time since she had been touched by another man. That was even without including the years she spent frozen in a capsule. Her imagination began to get ahead of her, and her hand made the slow crawl down to her privates beneath the shirt, face getting flushed.

"Tsumeki" Naruto grunted from the bed.

She froze up, breath coming out in halting gasps. "Eh-" her voice was a mere squeak, she cleared her throat. "Yes Naruto?" She heard him get out of bed, feet touching the floor not far from her. Had he noticed? Was he going to have his wicked way with her?

Naruto yawned, stretching. "Get in to the bed" he said with a commanding tone, pointing at it.

"O-okay" She got up, almost forgetting to hold the shirt against her bare privates as she stood. Would she even need it? She felt compelled to crawl in to his bed.

Naruto shuddered at her scent as she stood; perhaps he was just imagining it. Once she was wrapped up in his bed he lay down on a further-away part of the floor. He would've never been able to get to sleep lying in that bed. She'd obviously been napping in it at some point while he was gone.

Tsumeki's ears perked curiously as his footfalls got slightly farther away "Naruto? What are you doing?"

He pondered for a moment how to answer; he could hardly be honest. There was no point disgusting her. "Nothin'...bed was too comfy". The ache of his chest was easier to sleep with than an aching groin would be. "What, you weren't expecting me to join you right?"

Tsumeki bit her lip "Tch, you wish...idiot".

She listened to Naruto's breathing become slow and rhythmic. Despite the fact that the heat in her loins was beginning to die down, she couldn't help but feel a little let down.

One-Shot. End of Part One.


	3. Part Two

_**Author's Notes**_

_**Okay, this one shot turned out way more immense than I expected. Not only that but I'm half a week late updating it. Not only THAT but I've not been able to finish it yet. I still need another 10,000 words to conclude what has become my favourite writing project yet. But hell, I promised I wouldn't do more than a second part...**_

_**Hell you know better than to trust any promise for content or deadline on my part. So now I've decided that I will no longer give you a deadline unless I've actually finished writing it already. Not will I make a promise for how much it will have in it.**_

_**Still, this part is, in my opinion the better of the two. It was even beta'd by Mikie-from-Ireland. If you don't know who he is then what are you doing reading my crap? I have but one simple request from you all, wonderful, patient, loving, sometimes flaming, readers.**_

_**Review this. Please? I want to know genuine thoughts on your part. I didn't even see much in the way of the usual "great one, wants moar!" review either, so it makes me wonder if you're liking it or not. I can see the numbers of people reading this story; and there are a lot of you. I know you're out there! *fingerwaggle*.**_

_**Infact, if I don't get enough reviews I'll conclude it's down to lack of interest (which has infact been my main fear) and not bother concluding this story. Sorry to those minority who're reading and enjoying.**_

_**Now to sleep, I've a stomach full of alcohol. Nightynight lovelies and loveliettes! -Some Kind of Drunken Wizard xxx.**_

_**---end of note---  
**_

One-Shot. Beginning of Part Two

Naruto groaned in to wakefulness, taking stock of his environment. For one he was on the floor, two his ribs didn't ache half as much as he expected. He took in a slow breath from his nose, cringing at his own morning-breath. He was used to waking up on floors and feeling like crap after drinking, but he'd never felt so...not right. He hauled himself up, cringing as cramped, cold muscles were forced in to working again. He glanced over his shoulder, assured that Tsumeki was asleep. It occurred to him that the world held slightly more depth.

Naruto walked in to the bathroom, tugging off his shirt, flicking a tab on the sliding door so that it remained open. He leant over the bath and pressed the music console. "Play list...select...morning" he muttered to himself as he selected the menu items, cranking the volume up. 'Now Playing – Shut Me Up (2007) As he walked out the music began to play, blaring heavy metal through his bedroom.

Tsumeki yelped at the blaze of music. She sat bolt upright, at some point through the night she'd ended up completely undressed. She had probably overheated in the night. It was this now-naked chest which greeted Naruto, who gulped, turning around and wandering in to the kitchen, locking this door too so that it remained open, allowing the music in. "What are you doing Naruto?" She scanned the room, a clock sat atop the chest of drawers. "It's...eight in the morning!"

Naruto chuckled, yelling along to the song as he opened the fridge, pulling out some bacon. "The bass, the rock! The mic, the treble! I like my coffee bla~ck! Just-like-my-metal!" He switched on the stove, dropping his bacon in to a pan. "How much do you want Tsumeki?"

Tsumeki cringed at the loud music, only just barely hearing Naruto over the din of the music. She shouted through the room "Lots!" She dragged herself from the bed, padding through to the kitchen.

Naruto began his usual morning multi-tasking. He added extra bacon, turned on the kettle, and got out some coffee, all the while shouting along with the song. "I can't wait for you-to-knock-me-up! In a minute, minute! In a fuckin' minute!" He was oblivious to Tsumeki sneaking slowly up on him, or to the fact that she was curiously inspecting him.

Tsumeki wrinkled her nose, confused by the presence floating from Naruto. She sniffed at his hair, which made him jump. Amazingly the pan of bacon flew in to the air, followed by a short hiss from Naruto as a few droplets of bacon fat splashed his chest.

Naruto deftly caught the bacon and returned it to the flames, he glanced over his shoulder. "Do it again and I'll cover y--" He turned back around again; she was completely undressed still.

Tsumeki's teeth flashed in a grin. "Oh Naruto, Naruto. Could it be you're shy of this body?" She stepped in closer, still sniffing at him curiously. Something was definitely odd about him, she shifted his hair, much to his disgruntlement. She frowned, noting the subtle point at the tip of his ears, she smirked as he shuddered at her breath on his ear.

"Will you bloody stop it? Look" Naruto pointed at the kettle, it clicked off the moment he pointed; good timing. "Kettle's done, go pour some coffee".

Tsumeki grunted, taking her hands from him and padding over to the kettle "How do you want it?"

The music answered for her as Naruto sang "I like my coffee black! Just-like-my-metal!" He glanced over his shoulder again as he turned the bacon over, gulping at her rounded arse, sticking up ever so slightly in the air as she poured the coffee, tails flowing around her slowly.

"Where's the sugar?" Tsumeki asked, turning to note Naruto's inspecting of her body. She shook her backside seductively, teeth revealed in a foxy grin when his face went red.

Naruto turned his attention back to the food "Bottom cupboard just in front of you". To his credit he didn't turn around and watch when Tsumeki bent down _incredibly _slowly and opened the cupboard. "Can you please go put some clothes on after?"

Tsumeki didn't answer his request, giving herself eight sugars, no milk. She took a sip, satisfied at the taste.

Naruto made a face at her "That's just...blech". His tongue hung out as he said it, he went in to another cupboard, pulling out two plates, sharing the bacon out – much to Tsumeki's dislike – evenly.

After Naruto forced her to put on an extra-large shirt; as much as she was willing to wear early in the morning. They ate. "Tsumeki, I'm going to work in twenty minutes, so you've got to wait here until I'm back".

Tsumeki pouted "How long will that be?" She wolfed down the rest of the bacon before he could finish speaking.

Naruto yawned, stretching. "About eight hours".

"Eight hours?" Tsumeki all but yelled over the music, incredulous.

Naruto shrugged "Give or take a couple of hours".

Tsumeki stole Naruto's last piece of bacon, before folding her arms. "I can't sit in this damn box all that time!" Her tails flitted back and forth in irritation.

Naruto shook his head, standing up and gulping down the rest of his coffee. "It's either wait here or end up strapped down to a table".

Tsumeki smirked, raising an eyebrow and pouting seductively "That might not be all that bad".

Naruto glared down the comment. "I'm serious. Not only that but if you're caught I'll probably get discharged, or worse imprisoned if you turn out to be potentially dangerous".

Tsumeki huffed, arms still folded. "How long will I be trapped – nay, _imprisoned_ in this stupid room then?"

Naruto pondered. "Four days, then we'll be back on earth to turn over the cargo, pick up more, get some repairs, do some shopping, shore leave. Then you can leave and never have to see me or this stupid room again". He made the last point matter-of-factly, wandering out of the kitchen and in to the bathroom. He was going to be late soon.

Tsumeki leant her head on her palm once he'd left. "I don't want to go out there alone..."

14th year, ninth calendar, march 14th, 11:00am

Tsunade stood before Naruto, arms folded. "Look, we're giving you a suspension until shore leave. I thought sending you out there to so _something_ would've helped to set you straight. But no, _nooo_ you can't go a single night without starting a fucking bar fight!"

Naruto cringed, he probably should've tried to shout her down and have her lighten the suspension, but it was probably better that he stayed in his room until he could get rid of Tsumeki. "Fine granny, I'll go down to the training deck, see if I can't improve on my bar-fighting, hm?"

Tsunade grunted, dismissing him with a wave of her hand. She observed his leaving however. Something about him was off, was he becoming more mature? Maybe it was a girl?" She cackled at her own thoughts; that emotionally damaged child would never grow up _or_ find a lass. Or if he did she would have to be something completely twisted and brutal.

Tsumeki was sat in the bath, up to her neck in bubbles and humming along to some of the more softer music in Naruto's collection before sneezing. "Huh...have I been in too long?" She shrugged, reaching up to select another song. She soon began her humming along, damp tails escaping the water from time to time.

Not long after this saw Naruto, stood in an empty space. He held a standard practice pistol (infra-red, no live ammo), and pulled on the VR lenses. For some reason he felt on top form despite the odd twitch of pain from his ribs if he stretched out too far. There- he shot the pretend person before he'd even had a chance to peek more than a fraction of his head from behind the barricade. Weird, he wasn't a bad shot, but he was nowhere as quick as- another was taken out quickly as he bared his gun through the window; two shots disabled his hand and pegged him in the head through the wall.

Naruto would've continued if not for the flash from his lenses indicating someone had just walked in front of him. He tugged them off, grimacing to see Sasuke. "What do you want y'emo bitch? Can't you see I'm busy here?" He tensed up, half expecting a fight. Or some molesterous advance.

But neither came. Sasuke walked over to another set of goggles and a gun. He flicked a switch on them and they buzzed to life. Sasuke frowned as the two sets connected, something was different about his one-day-to-be husband. "C'mon sweetie, lets play a game and I'll forget you started a fight with me".

Naruto growled "You're the one who started it arsehole". However he placed his goggles back on. Two scores appeared at the top of the display, one was his, the others was Sasuke's.

Sasuke scoffed, shaking his hand. "Not how I remember it you stupid drunk bastard" He failed to get a reaction out of Naruto. The goggles buzzed again, starting up. A figure appeared, jumping from behind a barrel, rolling to the side. He shot him mid-motion through the head. The score updated, to his surprise Naruto's was still even; a head shot as well? "How about we make this interesting?"

Naruto smirked. He felt invincible for some reason. "You're on bitch, what're the stakes?"

Sasuke chuckled. "You'll kiss my shoe if you lose. In fact- no, you'll kiss my bare toes". He could almost hear the shudder from Naruto as he dodged the imaginary fire from an enemy, pegging him too in the head. He grunted, Naruto's score was only slightly lower.

Naruto smirked, he bolted a man through the eye before the face was visible. "Fine, then I get to punch your pretty face if I win. I owe you it". The scores were even again. The next minute followed with the numbers of people appearing increasing with speed and difficulty to spot. Within the last twenty seconds Naruto gained a total advantage. With the final shot he took great pleasure taking the man out in the knee-caps and expending all of his ammunition on the figure. He won regardless of the wasteful shooting.

Sasuke stood in shock "When in the fuck did you get so good?" He was about to take off the goggles until he was caught off guard by several knuckles slamming hard in to his jaw, distorting his face with the pure force.

Naruto blinked at his fist. "I guess I don't know my own strength..." He placed the goggles and gun down out of the way, tip toeing out of the shooting room as Sasuke struggled to rouse himself to consciousness.

A few hours later Naruto ambled around one of the Konoha's various shops. He picked out a bottle of cherry brandy, some various meats, pastas, and a few extra cups of instant-ramen.

The shopkeeper grinned at the selection. "Why I'll be damned Mr. Uzumaki. This looks li' enough food for two. Y'snuck a date up in to your room 'ave yah?"

Naruto, quick enough to think on his toes for once, merely smirked, looked away, and forced a blush to his face. It was easier than expected; he just had to think of the various moments he saw her naked. "Eh...uh, just take the money". He held out a fistful of notes.

The shopkeeper only nodded in a knowing fashion, he took the money, provided change, and waved Naruto on his way.

When Naruto finally entered his room, he could see Tsumeki sat up on his bed, brushing down her tails and purring to herself. For once she actually looked rather docile and cute as opposed to greedy and seductive.

Tsumeki's ears perked up at the rustle of a shopping bag in Naruto's hand. "Is that food? Also you got back a lot earlier you sand, and also would that be food by any chance?" She grinned, placing the brush down, stomach grumbling at the mere mention of a meal.

Naruto rolled his eyes, nodding. "What've you been doing all day?" He walked through to the kitchen, placing the bag down.

Tsumeki lifted herself up, wearing a pair of his jeans and his hoodie again. She'd also finally gotten to poking a hole in the jeans to allow her tails proper freedom. "Nothing really, I bathed, ate, groomed, and listened to music. What do you do for fun in this place?"

Naruto frowned "Uh, I have a pair of VR goggles and a gun if you want to shoot targets". He turned, noticing the fact that his bin was a lot fuller than he remembered. "Oh no..." He took a shaking step away from the bin after having glanced in it; all his ramen was gone.

Tsumeki followed him in to the kitchen. "Oh you mean that game? I got bored of it, is there any way to turn the difficulty up on it?"

Naruto whirled "Putting aside the fact that you've eaten all of my food, what do you mean turn the difficulty up? I have it set to a professional level all the time" He frowned, walking back in to his room. He spotted the goggles on the floor and put them on. A few switches and the goggles buzzed with the high scores on it. "What the fuck..."

14th year, ninth calendar, march 14th, 09:00pm

Naruto placed the two plates of carbonara down, getting out two glasses. He didn't even have to call for Tsumeki, she was sat down instantly (though to his surprise the food hadn't already disappeared). He poured out the brandy, and placed one of the glasses down in front of Tsumeki.

Tsumeki frowned at the alcohol, reaching for it. She'd never really touched any alcohol, but it did smell very sweet. She took a curious sip, shivering as it burned gently down her throat and made her mouth water. "Oh...oooh, I like this drink a lot!"

Naruto rose an eyebrow, beginning to eat. "Uh...huh. It just happened to be cheap at the moment. I can't afford much because _somebody_ is eating their way through my income.

Tsumeki grinned innocently, knocking back the entire glass. She coughed as her throat tightened. "Euurgh!" She quickly wolfed down her meal, seeking to bury the alcohol before it got to her head.

"Oi, easy on the eating, you'll make yourself sick!" Naruto grunted, sipping from his own glass. He inspected her as he ate. She was definitely odd; for one she liked his cooking. He also wondered at her consistent teasing and attempts at seduction. Perhaps she was just desperate, and part of him wanted her to try harder. The other part of him just didn't want to be touched, to be made weak.

Tsumeki grimaced under the increasing intensity of Naruto's stare. Something about him was bothering her. She got up to grab the brandy bottle from the side, using the moment to sniff at his neck casually.

Naruto flinched, brushing her away. "Get off-a me damnit!" He watched her walking over to the bottle. "What is it about me anyway that has you doing that? Or do you just like watching me shit myself?". He grumbled and resumed eating, not really expecting an answer.

To his surprise, Tsumeki spoke up as she poured out a refill. "I'm not sure. Perhaps it's just something about you. Not to mention there's something physically...well...odd about you anyway". She gulped down another mouthful. "In fact, hold still and try not to blush and freak out this time".

She got up once more from the table and stood in front of Naruto. She sniffed at his neck, although she found herself unable to keep herself from smirking as he gulped. "Y'don't smell human. I really don't think you do. Not quite".

Naruto nearly dropped his cutlery, frowning up at her. "What do you mean _not_ human?" Before she could even reply he began rambling. "I mean I guess I feel sort of funny, but then again I've never been good around people. A lot of them hate me for no reason...but, still. Surely it's a far stretch calling me not human?"

Tsumeki shook her head shushing him. "What I mean is...aw geez, I don't know. Just forget it. If you continue to feel funny then tell me".

Naruto huffed, draining his glass and getting up. "Tch, funny of you to be thinking of someone other than yourself". In fact, why was he doing anything for her? Had she just overpowered him with her sexuality? Then he looked up at her eyes and remembered how cold and alone they'd looked when he told her how long it had been. Right now those eyes were clouded with worry, and he was shunning genuine intentions.

The moment of worry passed as Tsumeki grumbled, swigging straight from the bottle in her hand. "Is that a problem? I was trying to be nice since you look like something's bugging you". She took another gulp, walking out of the kitchen and throwing off all of the clothing.

Naruto looked away as she did so. "What the fuck are you doing now?" Was she going to try and win him back with her body? No, she'd sounded too angry. Even the automatic closing of the sliding door seemed angrier than it was.

Tsumeki rummaged under his bed, pulling out the membranous cape she'd used before. She threw it on and tugged the switch, gulping down the rest of the bottle and throwing it on the floor. "Fuck, maybe that was a little too much". That alcohol would hit her hard. She slammed a fist on the door out and exited Naruto's apartment completely.

Naruto heard the smash of a bottle and almost leapt from his chair. He ran through the kitchen door to find the bedroom completely empty. He checked the bathroom too, assuming that was the reason for the removing of her clothes; nothing. "Oh shit she couldn't of!" A further check under the bed revealed his fears were true. She was running around the ship.

Tsumeki stumbled along the corridor, completely drunk and totally lost. She slumped against the wall beneath the cape and curled up. "What was I thinking? I barged out of Naruto's place over a few stupid words..."

Gaara frowned, had he imagined a voice? He peeked around the corner of the corridor. "Is anyone there?" Then he jumped, looking around behind him. He very clearly heard someone swear. Then there was the scrabble of feet ahead of him. "What the hell is going on?" He stepped forwards and felt a tug, as though he'd been stood on something soft.

"Argh! My foot!" Tsumeki yelped, jumping away from the cape. Then she froze up as still as a statue, tears welling in her eyes at the gun being pointed at her face. "O-Oh--".

Gaara stood dumbstruck, inspecting the woman before his gun; not only was she naked (something he easily ignored, much used to the ministrations of Karegawa) but she had tails. "What the fuck are you?" He shook his head, trying to clear it. He repeated again with a sterner voice. "Who, what are you miss?" He flicked the safety of the pistol off with his thumb. It would only zap her hard enough to incapacitate her.

The drunk Tsumeki instead slowly sat down on her knees, retreating in to her tails as far as she could. "N-Naruto...I'm shorry..." She heard a click, and then the world went black.

Naruto had been pacing back and forth for some time when he heard a knock at his door. Silently he prayed and walked up to it. He frowned with worry when the door slid open of it's own accord; someone with higher clearance was opening it. He wasn't quite expecting to see his long-time friend Gaara and an inebriated, mumbling Tsumeki. "Aaaah...uh". His brain worked as fast as it could to fathom some form of story, anything to get away with this unscathed. The level stare he was receiving from Gaara told him it would have to be one hell of a story.

Tsumeki babbled, looking at Naruto with bleary eyes. "Oh Naruto I'm sho shorry! I totally overreacted and shtormed out and was bosshy and needy and made you shleep on the floor! You've been helping for no reason and I've been a total bitch. I don't care if you're rude and untouchable and unlovable I'll stay, and be really good and do what you shay. Ooooh but now we're going to diiie". She didn't even take a breath. Although she probably should of, she felt too dizzy to support herself.

Instead Naruto's brain only managed two words. "Aw shit..."

Gaara held Tsumeki up by the back of her neck, at a distance as though she might turn face and spit acid at him. Chances were higher that she would turn face and throw up on his arm. He soon released her. "Okay Naruto. Three questions..." He paused, watching as the naked, drunk Tsumeki rolled about on her front. Reminded him of Karegawa when they first went out. "Who is she? What is she? And what on the Konoha does she have to do with you?

Naruto nodded, burying his head in his hands. "It's a pretty long story". He looked down at Tsumeki, eyes softening, at least slightly; she wasn't dead. Yet. "Grab a seat, I'll go make some drinks".

Gaara shook his head in a no, watching Naruto sternly. "Give me the short version, I'm still fighting the urge to zap you and her, and drag you both down to the Science department.

Naruto sighed "Okay. The condensed story..." He began walking through to the kitchen with Gaara in tow. "Her name is Tsumeki. She says she's an alien called a 'Kyuubi'. As for what she's doing here..." He opened up a cupboard door and pulled out a flask, sniffing at the contents. He shuddered at the sharp odour, his eyes watering slightly and his saliva flowing reflexively. "I found her in one of those crates and let her out. She used some kind of stealth cape to sneak out and stay with me".

Gaara nodded, holding up said cape. "Okay then...two more questions"

Naruto smirked. "Shoot".

Gaara folded his arms, inspecting his friend's face very closely. "Why _did_ you help this woman?"

Naruto sighed, thinking for a moment. "Truth be told I'm not even sure myself...When I saw those lonely eyes I had to help; she's been frozen for a long, long time. Everybody she knew is long dead". Gaara looked as though he had been expecting more from Naruto's answer. "Okay, I admit, she's beautiful, and almost always naked for some reason. But I'd like to think I had a better reason than that".

Gaara nodded, placing the stealth-cape down on Naruto's modest table. "Okay, and now for my second question". He watched Naruto turn to leave the kitchen, flask in hand. "Are you still a virgin?"

_**Slam**_ Naruto dropped back in a stream of curse words, clutching his nose for a moment. He closed the offending cupboard and turned to face Gaara, face red with impact and embarrassment all at the same time. "Yes damnit, I'm still a virgin. You think I'm going to give myself up to _that_?" He opened the kitchen door and they could both see in to his bedroom, Tsumeki had managed to roll on to her knees, and she was looking at them both curiously.

Gaara almost chuckled, following Naruto in to his room, watching him hold out the flask. "Naruto..." He received a grunt in answer. Naruto was holding out the flask, the contents of which appeared to be terrifying Tsumeki to no end. "I'm not going to tell anybody. Especially not Karegawa".

Naruto let out a small sigh. Tsumeki was trying to stumble backwards, but Naruto had a firm grip on her. "Thank you Gaara, you're a real life saver. Literally".

Gaara nodded "Yeah, but I don't want to have to keep this secret forever. We land on Earth in a couple more days. Get her off the Konoha then, I don't want to get in trouble".

Naruto grinned, pinching Tsumeki's nose and feeding a gulp from the flask down her neck. She wasn't even close to sober enough to stop him, though the punch she threw was awfully close to landing.

Tsumeki gulped, eyes widening. She launched from the floor and over to the bathroom door, kicking it hard. The increased speed of the sliding door felt still too slow and she squeezed through before it was even done.

As the door slid closed Naruto could already hear retching and puking. Also on the door he noticed a dent. "Fuck me..." He pointed at it. "I know full well I wouldn't be able to put a dent on that".

Gaara patted him on the shoulder, heading out. "I should get going, Karegawa is waiting for me back in the apartment. Oh, and try not to get your cherry popped". He waved Naruto off with one hand and walked out of the door.

Naruto opened the bathroom door. Tsumeki was busy worshipping the porcelain throne. No doubt the concoction he created would be doing it's job for at least another five minutes "Welcome back".

Tsumeki took out a small moment from her wretching to look up at Naruto. She looked like a state "I hate you, so much right now".

Naruto merely smiled innocently "I know, but don't worry. I was given a forced leave of absence today, so there'll be plenty of time in the morning for sleep. I'll do a fry-up as well".

Tsumeki wretched again for another few moments, groaning. "I'm having a bath after this...don't wait up..."

Naruto wandered over, sighing. "Geez, have you never gotten wankered before?" He held back her elegant scarlet hair. He ignored the smell of alcohol-vomit (it was one he was much used to by now). "When your stomach settles, take another gulp from that flask".

Tsumeki hurled properly this time, groaning with inner torment. "Are you fucking _insane_ Naruto?"

Naruto merely chuckled as his current live-in partner blew chunks. "Trust me, you'll feel brilliant afterwards; then you can bathe".

Naruto stood diligently behind her, holding her hair back and making small talk for almost an hour. Once he persuaded her to have another mouthful her drunken stupor was thoroughly removed, and the worst of her stomach upset appeared to have vanished. ((SKoW: I know. If only eh?))

Tsumeki ushered him out of the bathroom. She flushed thoroughly and hopped in to the bath.

14th year, ninth calendar, march 15th 03:00am

Naruto stretched out on the floor, half naked. He was surprised at the lack of bruising around his ribs. In fact he was amazed to find they ached so little that he was able to forget about them. At long last the bathroom door slid open and Tsumeki groaned, walking up to him.

"Naruto..." she began, then frowned, scratching at one fox-like ear. "Uh..."

Naruto smirked, he lifted himself up and patted her on the head in the most patronising fashion he could muster. "Apology accepted. Now go to sleep". He jerked his thumb over at his bed and shambled in to the bathroom. When he was done he walked back in to his room surprised to find Tsumeki still awake. She sat there cross legged in his bed, an oversized shirt sliding down one shoulder.

Tsumeki stroked absently at a tail with one hand and rubbed her left eye with the other. "Where are you sleeping?" She watched Naruto point at the floor. "Fuck that. Get in to bed". Her voice dripped with the commanding tone, she patted the nearest side of the bed and shuffled up against the wall.

Naruto rose an eyebrow folding his arms. Gaara's departing words floated in the back of his head and he cleared his throat. "You think I'll be able to sleep in the same bed as you?"

Tsumeki pouted, looking up at him. "I'm not ugly to you with this, am I?" she rubbed one ear and allowed a tail to sneak up from the side of the covers.

Naruto smirked and shook his head. "Exactly the opposite; you're beautiful, which is why I'll never get to sleep". He paused, clearing his throat once more. "Uh...forget it. Just don't hog the covers, okay?"

Tsumeki nodded, parting the covers to allow him in. After a gulp from Naruto upon noticing she wore _only_ a very baggy shirt he 'manned up' and got in to the bed. She giggled a little as her warm body made contact with his much cooler skin, which probably made him all the more uncomfortable.

Naruto tried to slow his brain down. He faced away from Tsumeki and leant his head so far away it wasn't even on the pillow. He could smell her strongly and it made him feel fuzzy.

Tsumeki frowned at the distance. Although she was far from ready to pounce on Naruto, she couldn't help but feel how much she had missed physical contact; she would not let this chance go to waste. She tugged off her shirt, and placed a belaying hand on Naruto's arm when she felt him trying to get out of bed. "I'm not going to do anything. But you're not lying in bed properly.

Naruto felt the heat rush to his face as he was tugged backwards in to her, still facing away. Her bare chest was pressing against his back, and her left arm was wrapped around his waist. "What are you doing?"

Tsumeki smirked, breathing on the back of his neck, grinning as he shivered. "Getting comfy. No touching though, okay?" She squeezed him tightly and closed her eyes, breathing him in deeply. He seemed much more familiar now, much more comfortable.

Naruto squeezed his eyes shut just as tightly, feeling the familiar ache in his groin. But after the day's events he was much too tired to let that bother him. "Bedroom lights off".

14th year, ninth calendar, march 15th 11:00am

Naruto awoke to a strange sensation, for one was the purring in his ear. Purring was something he had to admit he was unused to. He tried to turn around, but found he was gripped rather tightly, being squished up against a beautiful, naked, sleeping fox-alien. That was definitely something he was even less used to. He glanced down at himself under the covers, groaning. If she didn't wake up soon it was going to be one long, uncomfortable morning.

Naruto heard an abrupt stop to the purring, which then turned in to a very familiar groan of agony. "G'morning, how's the hangover?" Naruto chuckled, taking a great deal of delight in her discomfort; the irony of a role reversal.

Tsumeki growled at his taunts, answering with a bite to his shoulder. After Naruto yelped she smirked and rolled over. "I feel like my head was just stood on..."

Naruto snuck from the covers, finally free from her grasp "I'll go make some coffee and fry up some bacon".

Tsumeki's ears perked and she sat nearly bolt upright, regardless of the wave of nausea "Bacon? You said bacon, yes?" as Naruto continued in to the kitchen, half naked she stopped to admire him. He had a great deal of muscle, despite his rather thin frame. Then her eyes travelled up to Naruto's head. "Aw shit" she mumbled as he turned to face her, eyes in view aswell. "Aw doubleshit..."

Naruto rose an eyebrow, mostly amazed that he had heard her. To his credit he ignored the fact that she was uncovered. "How do you want your coffee?"

Tsumeki slid out of bed. "Black, twelve sugars". She found the oversized shirt she had been using as pyjamas and slipped it on. "Uh...Naruto, you should probably go to the bathroom first though..."

Naruto nodded, assuming she meant that he was particularly smelly; he was in fact, and he could even smell that. He changed course and walked in to the bathroom, turned on his usual morning playlist. 'Now Playing – You Are So Beautiful (2008)'

_You are so beautiful, You are the kind of girl  
that has the chemicals that makes me fall in love  
Beautiful, you are the kind of girl, that has the chemicals  
That makes me fall in love  
Fall in love _

Naruto looked up in to the mirror.

Tsumeki was flicking on the kettle when from the bathroom she heard the incredible scream. "**What the fuck?**"

Naruto took in a deep breath, opening his eyes again. Instead of the usual deep blue pupils, he was being stared a by a pair of slitted scarlet eyes. His hair had taken on a slightly orange tinge, and his ears were those of a fox. "Tsumeki! Get in here now!" he bellowed, eyes wide. This was it; he was going to be dissected alongside Tsumeki for sure.

Tsumeki slowly walked in to the bathroom, although she wanted to look sorry, she couldn't help but lose herself in his eyes the moment they turned on her. The deep rage in them made him all the more intoxicating in her eyes. "N-Naruto, I had no idea this would happen!"

Naruto growled; something that sounded all the more realistic at the back of his throat now. He ran his tongue over now slightly-pointed teeth. "Care to explain what the hell you've done to me Tsumeki?" He ran his hands over his ears again, running his fingers past the previous location of his earlobes. He reached along and turned off the music, snapping his fingers when Tsumeki failed to answer him.

Tsumeki jumped slightly, turning her eyes away from his. "I'm not sure _what_ I've done Naruto. It's obvious that it's my fault. I've changed you..." She glanced at Naruto's waist, not spotting any tails.

Naruto grunted, burying his face in his hands. "...I'm so fucking doomed. There's no way I can get out of this without being shot to death..."

Tsumeki slumped on to her knees, lip trembling. She was going to get him killed. "I'm sorry...so...so sorry..."

Naruto's anger melted at her distraught face, but he still forced out one last growl. "I'm sure there are positives, at least until they figure me out I can see better, hear better, smell better...and I'm fairly sure this skinny body of mine is hiding extra muscle now..." He froze, remembering the force with which he shattered Sasuke's jaw, not to mention his increased shooting accuracy. "Weeell fuck...should've figured something was up with me".

Tsumeki rose an eyebrow, pondering Naruto's words. When Naruto offered hand she took it, and was lifted without a single noise. "I know I've uh...doomed us...but do you think you could cook that bacon up?"

Part of Naruto was relieved that she was making requests of him. "Fine...but if I start sprouting tails so help me I'll be pissed at you".

Tsumeki pouted. "I take that as a personal insult, I'm proud of these beautiful flowing tails. And you'd be proud of yours too if you had any". She nod-nodded, walking out of the bathroom as Naruto turned the music back on.

Naruto quickly served up breakfast, singing along to a song as he did so. "I can't be-lieve; the troubles that you caused, I feel it getting stronger like an open wound without the gauze!" He served the bacon on to plates, threw them in to a few slices of bread, and doused his own in brown sauce. "It's on my brain, driving me insane!"

Tsumeki made a face. "That sauce smells gross, why would you add it to something as amazing as bacon?"

Naruto smirked, bringing her a plate as he took a large bite from his own. "I'm surprised you even knew what bacon was. I take it you have pigs on...Kyuubi planet or whatever it is". His banter finished he sat in the chair opposite to her, thinking as he ate.

He was off duty until arriving on earth. As of yet, as long as he disguised his face, hair and ears he could pass off. Tsumeki would be able to sneak out under the stealth sheet. He could just run away to one of the more major cities, where aliens were commonplace. Back on Earth they'd made great strides to make friends with alien populaces, and many had taken a liking to Earth. The only reason Tsumeki (and now he) would be dissected is due to the fact that they're unregistered.

Naruto finished his bacon sandwich, stretching himself out. "As long as I go without being seen 'til the end of tomorrow...we just may get out of this not-dead". Even as he spoke the words, fate dealt him a four-hundred-pound-kick to his crotch. The lights in the room turned blue, and he counted down the flashes in his head. The last one didn't happen. "Weird...they aborted the jump?" He stood up from his table and walked out in to his room to pick up his intercom.

The mechanical voice of Shizune blurted through it. "_This is a staff announcement. An emergency __scramble of all staff personnel to the commander's bay. This is not a drill, compliance is necessary. Even if you've received a temporary suspension from service, or had your jaw shattered_". Naruto felt a cold shiver run down his spine. He could almost hear her voice hiss. "Damnit Naruto..."

Naruto ran his fingers through his hair and ears again. "What am I going to do now?" He threw on his uniform, looking about. "This isn't going to work at all..." He rifled through his civilian clothing, pulling out a matching black beanie and a pair of sun glasses. He had to use the hat just to get the shades to stay in place.

Tsumeki chuckled at his disguise. "You look like you're about to burgle this ship"

Naruto walked in to the bathroom to quickly brush his teeth and admire his reflection. "Are you kidding me? I look like some kind of agent now. Hey there sexy". He snorted, grabbing his ID card. "Now stay here. No drinking, and don't go to sleep in case something happens".

Naruto glanced down the hallway. Gaara and Karegawa were just heading out of their room and walking in his direction. He waved to them and turned about-face before they could get close enough.

Karegawa frowned at his appearance. "What's up with Naruto?"

Gaara frowned. "Not a clue. We'll ask when we get there I suppose. Wonder what's causing this? Terrorists? Makes no sense considering we're so close t'Earth now".

Naruto glanced back over his shoulder again, continuing his walk down to the bay and adjusting his shades.

Five minutes later and Tsunade was inspecting the assorted crew. "There's no way to say this easily. But we've been compromised by aliens".

Naruto's eyes widened from behind the shades. Gaara spared him a glance, his expression a mixture of confusion and irritation. Naruto could only afford the most incredibly subtle shrug he could muster as Tsunade continued.

"We have eight or so hostile aliens running about the ship. They've gotten their hands on armaments, and took out the guards protecting our jumper. We've sent out a distress signal, but we're going to be stranded for an extra day". Tsunade continued, she suppressed a groan, glancing down at Naruto. If it weren't for the massive staff gathering she would've confronted him about his absurd beanie-shade combination.

One hand stuck up from the mass, and Sasuke stepped forwards, bandages wrapped around the lower half of his face. His voice still wrung out true. "I thought Naruto Uzumaki was supposed to be guarding that particular entrance. Yet I see him standing right there".

Naruto growled beneath his breath. "Bastard..."

Tsunade cleared her throat. "Naruto was suspended of service, we're bringing him back however until these aliens have been apprehended. Most of the staff will go about your usual duties. I wish security members and all those with armament clearance to stay behind however..." She gave them all a long look. "We're in this together, we have received no demands, or contact of any kind. Assume everyone. Dismissed".

As the crowd dispersed, Naruto felt naked and exposed. He was no longer just 'part of the crowd' he would stand out as one of thirty people now.

Sasuke walked up to him, his usual perverse smile could be seen even behind the bandages. "What's up there honey? That clothing doesn't seem very regulation".

Naruto grunted at him. "Migraine, head cold. Fuck off". He waved Sasuke off with one hand, taking great delight in the fact that this motion made him flinch.

Sasuke tutted, taking a step away and allowing Gaara to walk past him. "How are you then bitch? Hope you didn't get too hurt last time".

Gaara whirled on one heel, gripping Sasuke's collar. "Try it again and I'll re-break that jaw".

Tsunade clapped her hands. "That's enough out of you three!" She inspected the motley crew. "What I haven't told the rest is how well armed this enemy really is. We have reason to believe they're using plasma rounds, and explosives. Our engines weren't just sabotaged; parts of them were blown up. We're lucky half of the Konoha wasn't annihilated in a ball of flame. As such, I'm giving all of you free access to the armory. Pick up some gear and return to your rooms. Naruto, Gaara, Sasuke, Kiba, and Lee will be on immediate response. The rest of you will be patrolling".

Naruto watched as she sighed, saluting them all, turning to face Kakashi and discuss something with him momentarily. Gaara put a hand on his shoulder and walked him away. "Gaara, this isn't Tsumeki. She's not armed. Hell she doesn't even have clothing..."

Gaara went slightly red. "Don't remind me. Also, what's really with the attire?" His attention turned to the armoury door as they approached it.

Naruto shrugged it off; he couldn't even tell Gaara about this. "I'm really just under the weather man. Too many late nights".

Gaara rose an eyebrow, totally incredulous. "You didn't have sex with her, did you?"

Sasuke bolted up behind them, nearly knocking Naruto over and ruining his disguise. "Sex with who?" He glared down at Naruto. "I have all the best intentions for you but so help me if you're sleeping around without me I'll cut your bollocks off".

Naruto growled, resisting the urge to floor Sasuke for the second time in as many days. "None of your fucking business. I'm still a virgin regardless, and for that matter, if you even dare to get near my crotch I'll murder you".

Gaara ignored them for now, punching numbers in to a pad and entering the armoury. He could never get tired of the wall to wall racks of guns, explosives, and in some cases absurd weapons. He made a beeline for his favourite assault rifle. "Laser rounds..." Then he reached for a pistol. "Plasma rounds..." and finally for an attachment to his rifle. "...Grenades".

Naruto smirked, he too made a beeline for his favourite weapon; an auto shotgun with chemical-dissolving rounds, and an oversized gun that looked like the archaic desert eagle had made children with a magnum revolver. "Whoever thought of a massive handgun with changeable rounds was a genius". He grabbed an attachment for this gun too, it was weighty but he could barely notice it. "And whoever thought of adding a chainsaw to a gun was a fucking god". The chainsaw attachment stuck out further than the barrel of his gun. He also grabbed two extra, smaller handguns out; laser rounds, miniature-chainsaw attachments.

14th year, ninth calendar, march 15th 05:00pm

Tsumeki yawned, leant back in Naruto's bath once again. She enjoyed the silence and the odd 'drip-drop' of water from the tap. Naruto had been in and out of the room a few times, kind enough to loan her two rather dangerous looking guns. Apparently they were the closest things to the practice gun she scored perfectly with. She had leant a lot of thought to how and why Naruto had changed, but only one real idea came to mind. She huffed, sinking her head beneath the steaming bathwater, unable to believe it. She brought her head up from the water, stroking down her ears and tail. "What is it about him?"

Naruto glanced down an unlit corridor, lifting his shades for a better look with his now clearer sight. A voice came from a headset; Kiba's usual gravely voice was beginning to grate on his over sensitive ears.

"_You see anyone down there yet Naruto? The guards reported something down your corridor and mine_". Kiba said.

Naruto sighed down the microphone. "Noth-" He caught the glimmer of something metal within a shadow. "Stay quiet" he all but breathed silently. He couldn't help but feel a certain amount of malice leaking from the corridor. He shifted his sunglasses up to the top of his head completely.

"Well ssshit" hissed a cold voice from the shadows. "I know those eyes anywhere, what's one of you doing with a bunch of ssscumlings?"

Naruto didn't spare the shadow a single word, he cocked his shotgun and fired a gritty burst. A flash lit the air and the shadow screeched. He was answered with two red bolts lighting the air, just missing his face. The shot must have been glancing, but his ears could hear the steady hiss of dissolving chemicals even under his hat. "Put the gun down or die". Naruto ordered, watching the shadow.

Naruto heard a click and dropped in to a roll, firing twice blindly in it's general direction. He grunted when three rounds of searing red laser-fire slammed in to his left arm, burning holes through his clothing, and digging an inch deep in to his arm. Luckily adrenaline numbed the pain and he fired twice more. The second shot connected and his target let out a high pitched screech. He had five more shots left.

Naruto swaggered slightly, ears ringing with pain. "Son of a bitch!" Then there was a clink of something bouncing, then there were three more. He fired once more and the shadow stopped moving, jumping as far back as he could and shooting his last round in the direction of the clinking.

His plan had been to melt the triggers on the grenades with chemicals; sadly, Naruto thought as the flare of fire erupted with un-natural slowness, this didn't work.

Back in her bath, Tsumeki's ears perked. She hadn't heard anything, but suddenly she was very troubled. She flung herself out without a thought, not even stopping to grab a towel.

14th year, ninth calendar, march 15th 06:00pm

"The explosion came from down here, Naruto was the one who went down here. His headpiece isn't working". Kiba growled, for once worried about his ally. The floaty-looking, bandaged-faced emo wasn't making his worry any easier.

"He'll be okay, my Naruto's stronger than any stupid alien" Sasuke frowned beneath his bandages. "Right? Well...right? Anyway, if he's hurt I can nurse him back to health, and then he'll fall for me!"

"And what if the fucker got himself killed in a ball of fire?" Kiba snapped, only to receive a punch in the gut from Sasuke.

"_Don't even dare think that you flea-bitten excuse for a human_" Sasuke seethed beneath his teeth. Picking up even more speed and allowing Kiba to grunt, mutter, and curse as he tried to catch up.

When they arrived however, they saw only a scorched room full of broken lights, pools of blood, a destroyed shotgun, two snapped-in-half laser-pistols, and the rotting-away remains of a scaly foot, still being eaten at by the chemical rounds of Naruto's shotgun.

Sasuke turned his nose up at the smell. "Where has my darling gone?"

Kiba got his own back on Sasuke by landing a square punch at his kidney. "Forget Naruto, look at that foot; it's massive. Whatever it belongs to probably ate him!"

What the two didn't notice was the still-wet footprints of a female, and the bloody drag-marks of Naruto. Ten minutes later their usual staff intercoms went off.

"_Guys?_" The electronic voice of Naruto began. "_I'm a little banged up, but nothing serious. I have one of the aliens...I just dropped it off with the science crew_".

Thirty minutes previously

Tsumeki grunted with effort beneath her stealth-cape. Naruto was a dead weight, and the alien was a destroyed corpse. The smell of chemical burns and charred flesh stung her nose. Thankfully the whole Konoha was on a basic curfew, and nobody was in the hallways to see the unconscious bleeding man with fox ears and the annihilated reptilian corpse of an alien being dragged along the floor by nothingness.

She snatched Naruto's ID card, swiping it and entering his room, dragging in her new 'luggage' quickly. The adrenaline of the drag now worn off she threw off the stealth-cape and leant over Naruto's chest, listening for a heart beat. It was slow and steady. She inspected Naruto's arm; the laser blasts were deep, but they weren't going to do permanent damage. A great deal of frag-grenade shrapnel was embedded in his bullet-proof vest. Sadly large slabs of razor sharp twisted metal were tough, and they were still piercing Naruto's abdomen. She quickly tugged this free. Naruto could recover from this sort of wound, she hoped.

Then for a slim moment she froze up; Naruto's breathing had stopped. So had his pulse. "Shit, no!" Tsumeki screeched, pinching Naruto's nose and sealing her lips over his. She ignored the intoxicating taste of his lips and blood, attempting to resuscitate him. She slammed her fists down on his chest. The cause was probably down to adrenaline shock, since the wounds were rather minor. Nothing happened and she tried again; his heart stopped but still he didn't breath.

Tears streamed down her face and she breathed down his throat again and again, only to be surprised when a tongue found it's way in to her mouth. She yelped at the back of her throat, springing back, only to sit on the reptilian corpse. Naruto was groaning and coming too.

"Eurg, was I smashed in the gut with a sledgehammer?" Naruto groaned hoarsely, an odd taste on his lips. He felt warm inside despite the pain lancing through his arm, threatening to black him out again. "Shit..." he was then dragged in to a rough embrace by a naked Tsumeki. He fought off a number of dirty urges, unsure of how to react. He slowly put his usable arm about her. "You weren't worried were you?" Naruto peeled Tsumeki free, smirking. "And why is it whenever I'm waking up you're naked?"

Tsumeki growled, irritated at her reaction. "What, no thanks for saving your life, and dragging your useless arse back here, along with this bastard?" She punched the ribs of the alien, hissing when he fist bounced from the scales. She stood up now, inspecting the corpse.

The body of the alien stood about seven feet tall, with a snake-like face, a tail almost as long as it was tall, and an incredibly lanky, thin body. It was coated with scales that just barely covered an incredible, twisting muscle-mass. As far as clothing was concerned, it wore nothing but an ammunition belt, with two empty holsters.

Naruto looked the alien up and down, grimacing upon noting the pouch concealing the alien's junk. His attention then turned to Tsumeki's face, which was growing steadily more and more horrified. "You know what this is, don't you?" Naruto thought back to the few words he and the then-shadow shared. "That's right, he thought I was one of you!"

Tsumeki frowned, running her hands through still-damp hair. "I have some rather bad news..." she met Naruto's gaze, taking a deep breath. "Basically...this guy here is a Hebi. A snake-based alien. Not only that; this one's a breeding male. If they have a female we could be up to our ears in these guys..."

Shock tore through Naruto's system as his brain attempted to come to terms with this. "Wait...is that likely? And how do you know this?" Even as he asked how, Tsumeki's eyes became clouded with sadness, and he instantly regretted it.

Tsumeki sighed, standing up straight and nudging the acid-burned, footless Hebi corpse. "It's pretty likely. Most of my race were wiped out by them. And as opposed to choosing one partner to share dna with. They just grab any old woman, hump them stupid, and 'Blam' that's three eggs. Give the egg half a day; that's an infant version of the alien. Although they don't grow to a breeding age for a week, they'll be big enough to kill a human, or smart enough to fire a gun..."

Naruto's jaw dropped. "That's madness! Where did they come from then? Why are they here?"

Tsumeki frowned, shaking her head. "They're not organic, they were created as a weapon. Somebody must've been storing a group of them to let out when we got closer to earth".

Naruto roared out some frustration, then looked himself over. His shades were gone, but his hat was still in one piece, he just had to avoid eye contact. "I'll be back in a bit; I'm going to drop this off at the science department".

Tsumeki gripped Naruto's shoulders. "You realise if you tell them about these aliens we're in trouble, right?" Her arms were gripped tightly by Naruto, who smiled reassuringly.

"I'll be right back".

14th year, ninth calendar, march 15th 06:10pm

Karegawa let out an awed breath. "Naruto...is this what I think it is?" she didn't even look at Naruto; her attention was on the damaged corpse of the alien.

Naruto nodded, eyes hung as far under the beanie hat as could allow vision. "Karegawa...what I tell you, I cannot let you ask why I know this; but we have a more important problem".

Karegawa turned her attention to Naruto at last, who looked up, lifting his hat and revealing entrancing crimson eyes.

"Please, as a friend; don't ask, okay? I dropped off the corpse, left, and you figured this part out by yourself".

Naruto spent the next ten minutes getting through it all as quickly as possible; he wanted to be gone before others arrived. When he was done Karegawa was pale in the face.

She shook her head. "That's...that's just impossible. I'll have to go to the department head". She shuddered at the thought; Dr. Orochimaru and his creepy assistant Kabuto gave her the creeps. As Naruto turned to leave she stopped him. "Just a second Naruto...I won't ask, but take these". She hurried over to a desk, rifling through it. She pulled out a small box, and chucked it over to Naruto, who caught it with his good hand. "Slip those on. They were made for tricking eye-recognition lenses. But it'll hide the...strangeness..."

When Naruto had finished jabbing himself in the eye with the pieces of electronic plastic that had the gall to be called contact lenses, he nodded a grim thanks and made his way out at speed, taking the longer, winding route back. At the entrance to the corridor his door was on, he peered around the corner; Sasuke was there, waiting. "Oh you've just got to be fucking kidding me..."

Tsumeki had finished toweling herself down when she heard a knock at Naruto's door. The voice of Sasuke rung out shrill. "Darling! I know you're in there!" She muttered a few curse words, thinking. Then a grin split across her face; she had heard about a man called Sasuke with an unnatural attraction to Naruto. She grabbed some clothing, and the stealth cape, and a fancy dress-hat.

Naruto swallowed deeply, mentally preparing himself, and he was about to walk around the corner to confront him when, to his horror the door slid open.

Sasuke's jaw dropped as the door slid open, revealing a busty woman wearing _his_ Naruto's clothing, and a large-rimmed hat that hid her eyes. Something else seemed odd about her that he couldn't quite place, mostly due to his current outrage.

Tsumeki turned her head off to the side, shouting at the empty bathroom. "Don't worry _my_ darling! You just stay comfy in the bath, I've got it!" She turned to inspect Sasuke again, tipping the rim of her hat only slightly, eyes still hidden. "Hey there, something up?"

Sasuke fumed, feeling the blood rush to his face with pure rage. "I came here because _my _Naruto got in to a fight with an alien, and I wanted to console him for getting injured, because he wasn't as good with a gun as I am". He folded his arms and gritted his teeth. "Little did I know some ugly _harlot_ had _tricked_ my wonderful Naruto in to falling for her!"

Tsumeki's eyes widened with anger. "You impudent little cunt..." She ducked her head, gripped the lip of her hat with her left hand, and threw her right fist in to Sasuke's bandaged jaw, annihilating the bone with unnatural power.

Naruto let out a low whistle as Sasuke dropped like a sack of rocks to the floor with nothing but a small whimper, blood spilling all over the place. He walked around the corner, deciding to play along. "Now, now...uh...sweet-stuff...that was a cruel enough prank, even if he did need some extra sense beaten in to him. I'll drag him on to the corner and have someone else send him to medical".

Tsumeki giggled, forcing down a blush. She stood back with an over-dramatic bow and let the door slide closed. The fact that he had called her sweet-stuff had her feeling all warm and bubbly. She sighed, letting herself calm down. "Ah damnit...I guess it's true Naruto". She stared at the still-closed door, taking off the top-hat with a twirl. "I guess you are what you are now because I love yah".

End of Part Two

**_Didja likey? Then tell me which parts and why! :p_**


	4. Part Three: The Finale

_**Author's Notes**_

_**Hey there lovelies and loveliettes. I finally got the last part out. Thankyou very much to all who reviewed in the end, I wished to get this out a whole -whole- lot sooner, but I've had a very shit three months or so. And there not even over yet, but I wanted to find the time to get this done. I don't think I was in the right mental state to finish this one-shot, and it had enough content to have been a full story. If I'd been smart enough to realise that in the first place it wouldn't have ended now. I've had to redo and rethink so many parts to fit it in to just three updates.**_

_**The ending is...well, you'll have to wait and see.**_

_**-Some Kind of Wizard**_

_**-[]-[]-  
**_

Beginning of Part 3

14th year, ninth calendar, march 15th 07:00pm

Karegawa frowned as she watched Orochimaru play with the alien, poking at its innards with tools.

Orochimaru finally looked up from the reptilian beast, straightening out his labcoat and shifting his long black hair from infront of his face, only to reveal a pale face that had never seen the light. Orochimaru licked his lips. "Now then Karegawa, based on what I've seen so far looking at this fellow's brain and sexual organs first, as you've suggested, leaves me to believe you knew what to look for".

Karegawa shook her head casually. "Nope, I just figured it would be the best place to check; call it an educated guess".

Orochimaru frowned, poking his tools again. "I'll have Kabuto run some samples. You go home for the night".

Karegawa's eyes trailed over to the clock. "What? But it's so early! I can stay for another hour".

Orochimaru dismissed her with one hand. "That's an order Miss Shukaku, leave now. I wish to work on this alone". He watched as Karegawa nodded stiffly, and left the laboratory. "Kabuto, go and contact Tsunade, tell her nothing of my findings, I'm going to go and warn the others".

Back within Naruto's room, he was just returning to find his bedroom bare. He sniffed the air curiously, walking in to the kitchen. "Tsumeki? Y'here?"

Tsumeki was sat at his table, drinking coffee. "Yeah, right here". She stood up, walking over to Naruto. "This may be a bit sudden, but I have something important to say".

Naruto, took an awkward step back as Tsumeki got in close. Then she paused, frowning. Naruto looked confused "What is it?"

Tsumeki pointed at his eyes. "Those, what happened to the beautiful red ones?"

Naruto smirked, taking out the contacts. He blinked as the world gained a little extra focus and depth. It was only now obvious how much better his sight was over how it used to be. "Better?"

Tsumeki shook her head. "Anyway...listen up. I've figured out what caused the change". She stepped in close again, finger to her chin. "Basically, I've been releasing a whole bunch of genes in the air, because I've chosen you, be it consciously or unconsciously as my partner. These genes have changed you". She took another step forwards, barely centimetres from a panicking Naruto. "There's no shorter way to say this than with more than words". She leant in the extra distance, pressing her full lips against Naruto's, lips parted ever so slightly.

Naruto's eyes widened in surprise as Tsumeki wrapped her arms around his neck and leant in, tugging his hat off. He felt her warm tongue push past his own lips and play around inside of his mouth. His body felt hot as she rubbed at his ears, her tongue running along the inside of his teeth. She moaned happily against his lips, wrestling with his tongue until she eventually found victory.

Tsumeki finally separated from the kiss, wiping her lips as they trailed some of Naruto's saliva. "I don't expect an answer from you any time soon, as it's so sudden...and there's no way you feel the same yet". She sat back down again as casually as she could force herself, willing down the redness of her cheeks (which were almost ghostly compared to Naruto's face at this moment). "But so you know, I'm really stubborn, and I'll keep on waiting until you do". She took a small sip from her cup, placing it down.

Naruto mumbled, brain mostly blank. "I'm just going to make dinner..." He turned about-face and busied himself with cooking. He wasn't entirely sure what to think, for a long time his emotions had sat at the back of his mind, stoppered over as though he'd never need them. Love was one emotion he'd _never_ even attempted to feel before. Even happiness spent a lot of time in that mental bottle. But right now he was unsettled, his stomach felt like it was full of butterflies, and his knees felt weak and shaky.

Tsumeki watched Naruto fumbled around at the hob, attempting to fry things and think at the same time. She had to suppress a giggle. "Erm...Naruto; noodles are burning".

Naruto blinked, snapping out of his thoughts, cursing and swearing as he struggled to rescue dinner from a future of charcoal and disappointment.

Two hours later they were both eating microwave meals. "Tsumeki...you really feel that way about me?" Naruto asked, forcing down the rather poor quality instant-lasagne.

Tsumeki nodded simply, equally dissatisfied with her meal of instant rice and chicken. "Yup. I do wish I'd told you after dinner though". She wolfed down the rest of her meal, standing up and stripping down the remnants of the disguise she had worn to confront Sasuke. She snickered softly as Naruto's jaw dropped, and she could feel his eyes inspecting her every curve. She shook her rear slowly and seductively, framed by the nine flowing tails. She glanced over her shoulder, she found his blush incredibly cute.

Naruto grumbled at being teased, slapping at his cheeks. He finished off his meal and stood up, meandering in to the bathroom and running the water. He peeled away his shirt and bulletproof vest, cringing as dried blood tugged at his skin and made the wounds burn. "Well I'll be damned" Naruto muttered, inspecting his abdomen in the mirror; there were several holes in him from the shrapnel. The truly impressive part was the fact that they were already healing. He rummaged around in a bathroom cupboard below his sink, trying not too crouch too far and aggravate his wounds. "deodorant...no...soap...no...condoms..." He blinked, inspecting the box; they'd just always been there, standard issue. "...Better leave those at the front of the shelf..."

Finally he found what he was looking for, tugging out a first aid box. He pulled out a spray can, reading the label. "Elastic sealant and disinfectant...invisible spray on cover". He took in a deep breath, holding it as he shook the can until the contents were thicker. He then sprayed straight on to all of the wounds, biting his tongue and yelping. "Should also read...warning. Burns like fuck". He waited for the cover to dry, testing it with his fingers. By now the bath was full with hot, steamy water. He stripped down completely and hopped in to the bath. The cover seemed to be working somewhat, but he could feel the throb of pain from various other scratches all along his body, and his arm was beginning to hurt all over again.

Tsumeki was sat on the bed, now wearing nothing but an oversized shirt. She had heard a yelp, and wasn't sure whether to check on him or not. She decided to leave him to it, and went back to grooming her tails, sitting cross-legged. "I wonder if you'll ever love me Naruto" Tsumeki murmured to herself, watching the bathroom door.

Thirty minutes had passed and Naruto began to feel woozy. He wasn't sure, but at some point the invisible plaster had begun to disappear in the hot water, and the bath was soon becoming red. He made one haul of effort and dragged himself out of the bath, groaning as his muscles protested. "Hot bath...bad...idea". He settled his feet down on the floor and focused on staying standing. He was apparently a little worse for wear than he'd anticipated. "Wait a sec..." he peered about, face-palming. "Tsumeki's used all the towels..."

Tsumeki whirled to face the bathroom door, to her surprise (and great delight) Naruto stood there completely naked.

Naruto inspected her cautiously, particularly the grin on her face that could only be described as 'Foxy'. He attempted to wobble forwards and ask for a towel, but his legs weren't listening. He wasn't sure when, but some time after he had blinked he found himself looking up at his bedroom light. "Well, that's not right..." he slurred. Had he been drinking perhaps? It certainly felt like that way. He also felt something on the back of his head, and now on his face.

Tsumeki had sprung from the bed the moment Naruto began to drop like a rock. She caught his head and lowered him down slowly; his wounds had reopened in the bath. No doubt Naruto's drunk expression was the result of extreme blood loss. She stroked his face, noting it was rather cold, and hopped in to the bathroom. The smell of blood assaulted her nostrils and she cringed visibly. "How in the name of hell did you manage that?"

Tsumeki glanced about, finding the medical bag, she spared the box of condoms that sat on top of it a smirk despite herself. She rifled through it and spotted the can she assumed Naruto had used. "Hm...is this it?" She murmured aloud, then snickered when she spotted 'Warning: Burns like fuck' scrawled across it in marker pen. "Ah...must be". She rushed back over to Naruto who was trying to sit up, which was only serving to keep his wounds open. The pushed him gently on to his back again, and sprayed the contents of the can over the deep gashes on his abs.

Naruto cringed at the faint burning sensation. But the beautiful face of Tsumeki was keeping his mind off of it. Had she always looked this good? He reached up a hand to rub one of her ears. At least, he thought he had. His arm was still lying dead as a rock on the floor. "Hm...worrying..." Naruto pondered aloud, raising a questioning brow from Tsumeki.

"Stay still, don't move a muscle" Tsumeki commanded Naruto rather sternly. She placed the can and walked in to the kitchen, rifling through Naruto's fridge and freezer. She found several slabs of raw steak in the freezer. With a shrug she bunged them on a plate and in Naruto's microwave. Once defrosted she walked back over to Naruto who, as he was told, was lying stock still, only his eyes followed her around.

Naruto watched Tsumeki kneel down next to him, purring. She held out a slab of raw steak, tearing at it with ease between her fingers. His brain struggled in to motion as he lay there feeling numb; what were the steaks for?

Tsumeki opened Naruto's mouth and placed the piece of steak in it. "Chew" she ordered him, closing his mouth back up. Tsumeki frowned at the incredibly slow pace of Naruto's eating. She lifted his head up at an angle to make his swallowing easier; he managed this at the cost of looking even more dazed. "Honestly you're a useless fool who brings shame to the name of the Kitsune". She inspected the rest of the steak, grinning "But now you're my useless fool, and I'll have all the time in the world to fix your stupidity". She tore off a chunk of the steak, quickly chewing it. She leant down and opened Naruto's mouth.

Naruto had felt unnerved by the odd look Tsumeki was giving him, and then insulted at her comments. He couldn't hold this against her though as she looked over him with all the care and possible softness her eyes could muster. He felt his lips being parted, and watched Tsumeki's eyes disappear as she placed her lip on his. His blood-deprived brain assumed for some reason this was a kiss against all logic, and when his tongue tried to gain entry in to her mouth he was surprised when the steak was dropped in to his own. He felt her rub his throat and he reflexively swallowed the meat. "Aaaah" Naruto just about managed, then closed his eyes, feeling safe and confident in the knowledge Tsumeki would look after him.

Tsumeki practically glowed with happiness as she carefully lifted the sleeping Naruto in to her arms, she placed him gently in bed, wrapping him up warm. She snuck under the covers next to him, placing his head against her breasts and stroking his ears until she felt tired enough to sleep herself. As the world became dark and she entered the world of dreams, she found herself wishing that Naruto would one day hold her like this as well.

14th year, ninth calendar, march 15th 07:00pm

Sasuke grumbled behind his new set of bandages. He'd been drugged up on painkillers and given a jaw-brace. Soon after his release he had been told that the science lab had finished preparations to improve his eyes. The built-in enhancements weren't running at full efficiency, unlike the singular one on Kakashi, which ran properly without having to share out brainpower. He eventually made his way to the lab, only to be instantly placed in a chair by Orochimaru.

Orochimaru chuckled sadistically. "My, my. What happened to your pretty face? That must've been one hell of a punch..." He rolled his eyes at the death-glare he received from the boy. "Anyways...I'm going to fix your eyes, I understand you can't talk, so just nod and I'll put you to sleep and finish the adjustments".

Sasuke nodded, prepared to go back out there and show that heavy-fisted bitch who's boss. The mask was placed over his face, and he had to breath in through his nose to get the effects of it. Though coupling knock out gas and heavy duty painkillers was probably the worst idea ever.

Orochimaru snapped his fingers, beckoning for his assistant. Kabuto arrived, bearing a syringe. "Inject him. Between the neck and shoulder, closer to the back, on the right side". He watched his orders being carried out, and grinned with satisfaction as an oddly shaped bruise formed. "Well, well. It looks like we have another snake on our hands". He walked over to a desk, rifling through the papers on it. "My, my. It is a busy night we have planned. Kabuto, go call for Kakashi's partner. That delicious Anko. She's just in the waiting area". Orochimaru peered in to the shadows at the massive, hulking figure, a sadistic grin on his face that was only broken when he took the moment to lick his lips.

Anko walked in, stifling a yawn. "Y'said you had my gun repaired? Why couldn't it have waited?" The look that Orochimaru gave her was almost chilling, and she was tempted to walk out. In fact, she would of, but something was gripping her arms. They felt like hands, but judging by the size and roughness, they weren't anything human. "What the hell is this?"

Orochimaru stood in front of Anko, holding up a syringe. "This is...well...the beginnings of an army. This here is a powerful sedative. If you behave well, you can have it".

Anko hissed between her teeth, and looked over her shoulder. She wished she hadn't; an eight foot, hulking figure with the head of a snake grinned down at her. She was guided over to a table and pushed on to it so her rear was sticking up in to the air. "If I get free I'll fucking kill you!"

Orochimaru tutted, dropped the syringe on the floor, and kicked it away. "That cost you your sedation. I hope you're ready".

Anko gulped, shuddering with horror as one hand placed itself on her back, the other grabbed at her belt, tugging down hard and ripping it free. "Get your hands off me you fucker! Somebody help!" She growled and bucked, but she couldn't break free from the iron hold. She looked over her shoulder again, hadn't she learned the first time that she would wish she hadn't?

The alien crouched down, over Anko's shoulder, up close to her face. "Greetings miss. I sure hope you're ready...this will not be a pleasant experience". Then it stood up straight again, pushing the arm-sized manhood up against her womanhood. "Well...not for you".

Orochimaru left the science lab, door sliding closed just as the screams began, airtight doors shutting out the sounds. "Right...time to take this plan up a notch".

14th year, ninth calendar, march 16th 01:00am

Naruto groaned in to wakefulness, the back of his head throbbing like the distant memory of a headache. He could hear purring, and his ears twitched. His face was not lying on any pillow he could recognise, and the gentle smell of Tsumeki lingered around it. For once in a very long time, he felt warm and safe where he lay, and his eyes remained closed when he felt her hand stroke one of his ears, and toy with his hair.

Tsumeki smiled down at Naruto, she thought he had woken up when his groan had woken her, but judging by the lack of reaction, and the gentle, innocent smile across his face, he must be asleep. She rubbed his ears slowly, playing with the soft fur of it much as she would have enjoyed. She murmured quietly to Naruto as she did this "One day you must do this for me..." She could have sworn he just smiled wider as she said that. She blinked; his face was normal. "Must need more sleep..." She hugged Naruto's head gently in to her breasts and was soon dozing off again, unaware of the almost silent purr escaping from him.

14th year, ninth calendar, march 16th 09:00am

Tsumeki yawned and stretched herself out, then yelped at a warm sensation as a thumb and forefinger rubbed along her left ear. "Nya-oi, what?" She blushed furiously when she realised she was lying across Naruto's chest, in the same position she had held him in the night before. She looked up at Naruto, purring audibly. "About time huh?"

Naruto grunted, he'd been awake for about an hour, left in his thoughts. He'd also used the time to perform an excruciatingly slow swapping of positions. His other hand rubbed at her other ear, and he grinned at the louder purr that escaped from the woman's throat. He sniffed at the air as a scent came to his nose. With a blink he peered down at her flushed face; the look in her eyes was deep and lustful.

Tsumeki growled slowly, she sat up and straddled him. "All that hoping and praying that you would hold me like that, and it's already happened, hm?" She placed one hand on each of Naruto's shoulders. She felt warmth spread throughout her body and she flexed instinctively, it had been a very long time since she had been mated with, and she hungered for it now.

Naruto could feel moisture beginning to drip on to one of his legs. Judging by the scent and the instinctive hardening of his manhood he could only guess why. He lifted a hand to Tsumeki's ear and gripped it softly, bringing her head slowly down, towards his face. He felt his body moving as though on auto-pilot, and her lips were parted and awaiting his own before there was even any contact.

Tsumeki's mind was a whirl of emotion as the slow descent towards Naruto's face began. Did he love her then? Maybe he didn't, and he was just after sex. Her eyes became half-lidded, and her lips parted slowly. It occurred to her that she didn't care what it was that Naruto was thinking; she wanted him now. The moment their lips met she pushed against him, tongue parting his lips and entering his mouth to meet his tongue. Her fingernails dug softly in to his shoulders as her tongue wrestled for dominance. The groan that escaped from Naruto reverberated down her neck, only seeking to increase her efforts. She brought a hand away from his shoulder, dragging it slowly down his chest.

"Naruto..." Tsumeki purred slowly, tongue breaking the kiss for a small moment; she delighted in his expression as the kiss stopped. Her hand reached behind her, and slowly gripped his still-hardening length. She grinned as he yelped softly, her thumb beginning to rub along the edge of his tip in small circles. "I want to make you feel amazing..." she kissed him again briefly, then lifted herself up to turn around. She lifted her hips in to the air, face now towards his manhood as she bent down. She licked his tip experimentally, purring at the shudder that passed through his body.

Naruto blinked, mind going blank; his blood was needed elsewhere. The only thing he could see was the slowly rocking hips of Tsumeki, and her dripping womanhood. He felt her rub his manhood up and down the length, then her lips met him, and slowly parted, slowly taking his entire length in to her mouth and down her throat. Naruto groaned loudly, resisting the urge to buck his hips. He half sat up, and brought his mouth to her womanhood, breathing it in deeply. The smell was intoxicating, and he didn't even need to think before his fingers were slowly parting her open, allowing his tongue a testing run from clit to entrance. He shuddered when she groaned, the sensation vibrating in her throat.

Tsumeki brought her mouth up and licked her lip. "Tsk, that's not fair...not fair at ah-" she was cut off mid-sentence when she felt his tongue run a slow circle around her kit, kissing at it before gently tonguing her entrance. "Uhn!" She leant back down again, pressing her hips up against Naruto's mouth as she sucked slowly on his head, tongue running expertly back and forth and around his length. She was rewarded with a low growl from Naruto, and then surprised as she felt his manhood jerk as her mouth was filled with his seed.

Naruto gulped with shock as the relief ran through him as he came. "Ah-uh-I'm sorry".

Tsumeki merely grinned, tongue still trailing a small line of cum as she licked her lips. "Mmm, don't be. You'd just better finish me off before we go at it for real".

Naruto nodded slowly, still dumbfounded, and began returning his attention to her womanhood, which now dripped with her sweet juices. He lapped them up slowly and resumed tonguing her entrance, finger rubbing gently at her clit. His tongue took an experimental run slowly further up, it gently teased a certain other entrance for the tiniest of moments, before returning back to whence it came as though it had never moved. His actions earned a short yelp from Tsumeki, he snickered softly when she slapped his leg.

Tsumeki groaned with pleasure as his attention brought her close to the edge, warmth travelling through the length of her body. With a long, and exceptionally loud yell she pressed her hips hard up against Naruto's tongue, body convulsing with an amazing orgasm. "Ahn-th-that's more like it..." she managed to pant she returned her attention to Naruto's manhood, which was just beginning to wake up again. "Are you ready for the next round Naruto?"

Naruto gulped, head falling back to his pillow. "My tongue'th tired..." he relished her taste however, and wiped his mouth with a grin. He grunted as Tsumeki sucked and licked at his length again, making it hard once more. She turned around to face him, and leant down towards him with a slow, adoring purr.

Tsumeki licked her lips, and nuzzled Naruto's neck. "Are you ready?" She didn't wait for an answer, and lined him up against her entrance. She slowly slid down on to him, a low groan of ecstasy escaping from them both as he filled her up completely. She yelped slightly in pain as she buried him up to the hilt. "Uhn-you're rather big y'know?" She smirked as Naruto nodded; it was likely he hadn't even heard what she said.

14th year, ninth calendar, march 16th 11:00am

He ran and screamed through the dark of the corridor, running with all haste to an emergency panel. He could hear the scrambling of heavy feet, and the loud hiss of the alien. Blood was splashed across his chest; his own fathers. He prayed that his mother had escaped. He slammed his fist down on the panel and whirled around to face the threat, he ducked in to a corner and curled himself up. "I don't want to die...I don't want to die..."

Tsunade's eyes scanned the screen, sections of the ship's rooms were going in to non-response. Something was wrong; were there more enemies running around than she had assumed? Each bright flashing light burned in to her eyes as though they were taunting her. "We're in a state of emergency..." She picked up a microphone, pressed down on the switch and yelled in to the intercom, even as more rooms went down, as the number of emergency calls were coming in to the main desk.

"This is your commander...I'm now instigating a mass evacuation of the ship. We've come under attack by an unregistered alien force, and it is of a number that we cannot contain. Please escape to the nearest location in an orderly fashion, guards are being sent along to assist with the process". She stalked away from the screen and placed the microphone down. "Fuck! Why is this happening? Why the innocents?"

14th year, ninth calendar, march 16th 11:10am

Naruto threw himself out of the bath with a start. "Tsumeki, put on some clothes and grab the guns I left for you". He towelled himself off only briefly and tugged on his uniform. He glanced about; his chemical shotgun had been destroyed, on the side however was his chainsaw-handgun. He picked it up and checked it over briefly. "Ten minutes of chain-fuel. Six rounds, eight reloads". His communicator was buzzing and he clicked it in to life. "This is Naru-" he was cut off by a metallic screech.

"_NARUTO! WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?" _The voice belonged to Sasuke. Which struck Naruto as odd; his jaw was in no speaking condition.

Naruto grunted a reply. "I'm in my room, why?"

He was answered with a hiss of a cackle "_I have Gaara and his bitch hostage. The ship is doomed_"

"Sasuke, are you out of your fucking mind?" Naruto growled, he looked over his shoulder; Tsumeki was dressed and inspecting her guns. "What's going on?"

There was another cackle. "_Orochimaru is leading us to victory; we're a special race now. We can take the earth, does that impress you yet? Huh Naruto? You want to go on a date with the vice-ruler of the master race? Oh. We'll change you too; I'll do the pleasures. Come to the commander's room, she's still evacuating people downstairs_".

Naruto's eyes widened. He shut off the communicator and attempted to reconnect to Tsunade, the line was busy. With a curse he hooked it on his belt and walked out the door, Tsumeki in tow. "You shouldn't follow me, stay where it's safe".

Tsumeki hissed "Before I was frozen I was a better fighter than you could ever be. And I'm not leaving you to get yourself fucking killed". She stalked past him.

Naruto watched her back with a raised eyebrow. That settled it; he'd equally fallen for this woman. "Tsumeki..."

She turned around to face him. "Yes Naruto?"

He paused, thinking of words, shaking his head. "Forget it, we've got to hurry. Fuck getting seen, this is more important". He sprinted past her and cocked his gun. "Don't fall behind Tsume!"

She grinned at his little nickname as they ran through a set of doors. Her ears twitched at a curious scurrying, as had Naruto's. They came to a stop and whirled to the right, two disgusting Lizard-creatures were on the floor. They stood a foot tall and appeared to be like Crocodiles, except their faces were stunted, and their knees pointed forwards; no doubt built for leaping. She drew her guns on them and fired a quick round; the lasers penetrated only halfway through the scales. She adjusted her aim and the bolts seared through the eyes of the first.

Naruto took aim on the second even as it leapt at him. Despite his heightened senses it still moved for him exceptionally fast, he had to spring back and unload two rounds in mid-air. The bullets sounded like small explosives as they left his gun, and thick flares trailed in his vision as the force severed the creature's head from it's body. "Not so tough." He kicked the head away and glanced about for signs of more.

Tsumeki growled at the corpses, memories filling her mind. "These are only children; there will be more evolved ones I'm sure".

Naruto shook his head and continued on at his run towards the lift to the command centre. If the little aliens had progressed this far already, the Konoha was in trouble.

A moment later brought them to the lift, they skidded to a halt at the corner of the corridor as two blasts of plasma hit the wall, mere centimetres from hitting Naruto in the face. He dropped in to a roll and took a rough shot towards the lift. He was rewarded with a grunt, but was answered with another two blasts, one of which hit him square in the chest. With a gasp he tore off the armour before it could burn through to his chest. The air hummed with energy and Tsumeki stood over him, venom burning in her eyes as she unloaded a charge's worth of laser rounds on each of the figures. The lizard-like corpses that hit the floor were so riddled with smoking, gore-seeping holes they were almost indescribable.

Naruto groaned and dragged himself to his feet. "That was a dumb move, guess I was rushing". He was slapped the moment he faced Tsumeki however, and tears were streaming down her face. She didn't even need to say a word. Naruto nodded "sorry..." He faced the lift, pressed the button and walked in to the waiting doors, Tsumeki at his side.

He wasn't quite expecting the sight when the lift doors slid slowly open, they sounded almost stuck, and he reflexively gagged at the odour on his enhanced nose. Tsumeki's eyes streamed slightly. He looked around with a shudder; men and women had been cut down. God knows what had happened to the women, he stifled a second shudder before a slow hiss in the dark drew his glare.

Sasuke stepped out of the shadows. Or, he was meant to look like Sasuke. The figure stood another foot taller, and his jaw was completely healed. His limbs were lankier and more muscular, and a long patch of green scales covered his bare chest. "About damn time you showed up Naruto...Ah...you brought your bitch along too" Then he paused, cocking a reptilian head to the side. "What the fuck are you two?"

Naruto folded his arms. "Where are Gaara and Karegawa?"

Sasuke huffed out a low hiss "It was a lie, they're both off helping to evacuate any survivors. Master Orochimaru is trying to hunt them out though. You're one of the few remaining staff up here, the rest are in the civilian blocks" He indicated the wall of screens at the far end of the commander's desk; nearly every sector flashed red. Hundreds of blips that indicated foreign life were flashing violently. He cracked his fingers out laboriously, taking a sick pleasure in the looks on their disgustingly perfect face. "Sssssssooo...I repeat my question. What the fuck are you two?"

Naruto held his gun at the ready. "Naruto Uzumaki, partner of Tsumeki, the Queen Kyuubi no Kitsune".

Tsumeki quietly bubbled at the statement, then turned about on her heel at a fresh scurrying. "Naruto, there are more here...I'll deal with 'em"

Naruto simply opened fire on Sasuke, but was surprised to find him no longer there, instead he was already a foot away from slamming his fist in to Naruto's jaw. His pupils dilated and he shifted to the side, but the blow caught him from another angle, sending him sprawling.

Sasuke huffed. "You're moving in slow motion Naruto". He looked at Tsumeki, who was now preoccupied fending off a horde of younglings. "If you don't hurry I'll kill your partner". He spat as he said it, hissing loudly.

Naruto growled, he sprang to his feet and switched on the chainsaw blade of his gun, sweeping upwards in an arc. Sasuke leapt out of range, but the motion left him open in midair, and he found two bullets piercing his gut. The ammunition was loaded with a powder that ignited with air friction, turning the bullets in to something more akin to bolts of fire.

Naruto knocked open the gun, and the empty shells dropped to the ground with a number of rings, with expert practice he managed to load in three bullets before being forced back by a resumed charge from Sasuke; the wounds were already beginning to seal.

Sasuke hissed triumphantly, kicking out. He felt a bone fracture under the power of his kick as Naruto brought up his free arm to guard. But two more bullets caught him in either knee, it didn't take much effort to swerve away from the last bullet aimed at his head.

Given no time to reload, Naruto went back on the offensive, swiping at Sasuke with the chainsaw. The piercing buzz hurt his ears, and screeched as it tore through the air.

Sasuke laughed he ducked under a jab and elbowed Naruto in the ribs, sending him across the floor and further from Tsumeki. She turned to face them for a moment, eyes a flash of worry before her attention was consumed by a leaping alien, which was quickly dropped with an elegant kick and a number of laser-bolts in the face.

Naruto groaned and held up his arm. "You worry about that Tsume, I've got this fucker handled".

Sasuke smirked. "You can't beat the master race Naruto, look; my wounds are already gone!" He indicated his knees. In truth they still hurt a lot, the bullets had nearly severed his legs at the knees.

Naruto stood up, gun pointed out. "Gloating time is reloading time you melodramatic fucker". He shot at Sasuke, trying to draw him in close. As Sasuke rushed in, dodging three shots and taking another in the shoulder, he sprang up in the air as two more bullets lodged themselves in the ground. Naruto grinned fiercely, crimson eyes burning with hate as he jumped in, chainsaw whirring. It caught Sasuke in the chest, and tore down loudly with the snap of bone and tear of organs.

Sasuke's voice bubbled as blood filled his lungs. "Hey-wait! I'm not supposed to die! This is so lame..." He dragged himself forwards on his knees, about to speak again. _I loved you!_ His mind screamed as the chainsaw pierced his eye, annihilating the contents of his skull.

Tsumeki limped up to Naruto, breathing hard and coated head to toe in blood. "They've stopped coming. We should leave the ship". She whimpered as she was dragged in to Naruto's embrace, lips meeting his.

Naruto purred at her, but his eyes seemed distant. "I've got to try and help them evacuate, you hop in the pod, I'll see what I can do and meet up to you".

He nodded along the room at the armoury door, to the right of it were several pod doors, and busied himself with the various buttons and panels. As Tsumeki opened up a pod door and slipped in, he rushed over and locked the door down.

Tsumeki's eyes went wide with alarm, she banged on the small window. Her voice screeched through the intercom "Naruto! What the hell are you doing?"

Naruto smiled innocently. "I'll catch up to you okay? I couldn't let you get killed here".

Tsumeki's eyes began to fill with tears. "You promise right?"

Naruto glanced along. "I don't know if I can promise...I don't want to die a liar do I?" He kissed the window and took a slow step back. "But I will try, I will try everything in my power to get those people out and follow you. I've set our pods up to head to a moon base...along with emergency transmissions..." He took another step back.

Tsumeki wailed, dropping to her knees. "Damnit Naruto, why?"

Naruto smiled, his own eyes becoming wet. "My parents risked everything to die for the one they loved y'know..."

Tsumeki gulped. "Loved?"

Naruto nodded and walked away, slamming a button on the panel and watching the pod launch away. He opened the armoury doors and ran to the back of the room; in it was a metal suit, roughly two feet taller than himself. He pulled a lever and a front hatch opened up, allowing him to slip in. A little adjusting and the suit matched his movements. He felt heavy with as much dread as it was the weight of the suit, and he lifted various weapons up and wrapped ammunition around his body.

He walked up to the intercom system and pressed a series of buttons, with a faint grin he lifted the helmet of the suit up. "Hey everybody, it's Naruto here! In the commander's room, spitting in Sasuke's cold mutinous corpse! I've got a song for you that I've been dying to play all week!" Naruto glanced along at the screen, most of the foreign dots were beginning to scramble about and regroup. He then roared as loud as he could in to the microphone as he pressed a button.

"_Days like this I wish that I, was denied a state of sleep. It's times like this that make it sooo difficult to breath!"_

'Now Playing – A Place to Die (2008)'

The numbers of enemies began to break away, and the numbers of evacuating pods began to increase in rate. He shouted down the microphone again. "Oi Gaara, Karegawa! If you're still alive down there somewhere there's this great woman I want you two to get to know! She'll be waiting down at my old shack on the moon, Gaara knows where".

He left the microphone and slipped the helmet back on, locking and loading a rather large assault-rifle on the main door. "...That's a lot of enemies..." Naruto muttered as the door slid open to reveal a wave of the aliens. He unloaded a full round on them in only several seconds, the second ready to be reloaded. The secondary door burst open, and he threw a grenade to keep them preoccupied. "Fuck..."

14th year, ninth calendar, march 17th 11:00pm

Tsumeki sat in the small room on a bed that smelt ever so faintly of Naruto. She looked out of the window hopefully, but her eyes scanned the barren landscape craggy landscape of the moon to no avail. An hour passed of just staring out before a crash was heard outside, she slid open the door and walked outside; the moon had been provided with an atmosphere long ago. A pod sat in a crater just twelve feet away. Tears filled her eyes and she rushed up to it as the spherical door slid open. But two figures got out; one she recognised as Gaara, the other she assumed was Karegawa. "...Wh-where's Naruto? Is he okay?"

The both looked downcast, as though surprised not to see him with her. "...We thought he'd already be here..."

_**The End.**_

_**I know. A sad ending, if I brought one single tear to one of you out there please let me know :P I doubt it did, but still. Please review me with your thoughts regardless. I'd love to hear them.  
**_


	5. Epilogue

_**Author's Notes**_

_**It seems a lot of you had to say something about my ambiguous ending. Although I'm glad you've gotten very in to my story, being told how to end my own stories is slightly insulting y'know? Even if a few were death threats. They were more funny than insulting. *snickers softly, sips at coffee*  
**_

_**But to those who shed a genuine tear, and thought of the ending as an ending I thank you very dearly, and I'm glad you enjoyed it so much. Makes me all warm and fuzzy inside.**_

_**Regardless, I'd been torn as to wether I'd put this in or not. I didn't want to do a definite ending. Because there are so many ways it could have gone. I hope you like this one. And please understand; this was a One Shot. I'm not saying it's impossible that I'll bring back the sci-fi. But this particular story is done and dusted.**_

_**-Some Kind of Epically Tired Wizard. Muah x**_

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Epilogue

The floor shook gently, and a rather disgruntled looking crimson haired beauty dragged herself out of bed. She looked in the mirror, and crimson eyes stared back at her. She stroked one ear; the tip of one had been slightly clipped by an alien on the day of her escape from the Konoha. She threw on a dressing gown she had modified with a cut at the back, and nine flowing tails pushed through it, and framed her body as she picked up a brush.

"Maybe it's Kare-chan..." she muttered.

The door to her home slid open slowly, and a blond-headed figure walked in, brushing off his pants and adjusting his jacket. "I'm back!" the voice announced, and the woman walked out of her room with a smile as she brushed her flowing hair.

"Welcome back Naruto" she said with a proud grin, looking the blond up and down.

"Well, what do you think?" Naruto asked, checking himself in a small mirror. He ran his hands through his ear, grinning as it tugged at his ears, long and fox like.

The red-head smiled, placing her brush down on the side and dragging the man in to a tight embrace. "Your father would be so proud of you".

Naruto grinned, looking faintly embarrassed. "Was he really just a security guard too mum?"

The red-head smirked and tussled Naruto's hair, standing up straight. She looked over her shoulder at a framed newspaper cut out. 'Naruto Uzumaki, saviour of hundreds, consumed in the explosion of the Konoha'.

Naruto grinned "His secret partner Tsumeki is hidden out in the universe somewhere, doing great deeds such as his own" he recited. They both knew every word of that cut out by heart.

Tsumeki leant down and kissed her son on the forehead. "So help me if you pass on, I won't be pleased one bit". She looked out of her window at the decrepit pod she'd escaped the Konoha on. She'd never moved it, in seventeen long years.

Naruto watched his mother for a moment, sighing at the look of sadness in her eyes. "I know mum, I'll make it back in one piece". He walked out of the room, leaving her to her thoughts.


End file.
